Recently I cried. Not the big, scrunched up face and eyes, deep sobbing kind of cry…just a gentle tear or two rolling down my cheeks. It still messes up the mascara and such but I wanted you to be the first to know that whilst it was still a heartfelt cry, it wasn’t the kind that spiralled out of control, till you can’t breathe sort of cry.
We were chatting on the phone, Louisa and me, general girl stuff about life and love and joy and kids and relationships. And she began to talk about how for much of her life she’d struggled with her weight…you’d never know to look at her; how hard it had been for her to socialize because of her discomfort with strangers and however hard she tried she didn’t believe she was the best mother in the world.
Really? Anyhoo, she judged and found herself wanting.
I was amazed. This girl is beautiful, witty, charming and probably the best mother I’ve ever seen…present company included and I think I’m pretty good.
She’s generous of spirit and heart, the epitome of kindness, and yet here she was filled with fear, doubt and insecurity.
It wasn’t this that made me cry.
Louisa told me that recently she came across three little words that took her breath away, that stopped her in her tracks and led her to begin to revalue herself.
What were those three little words?
YOU ARE ENOUGH.
They spoke to her…they nudged and encouraged her to be kinder, to herself. She began to take the time to meditate, just five or ten minutes a day. She began to imagine herself being the woman everyone else could see. She gave herself permission to pay attention to her needs.
These simple little words had a huge impact on Louisa, creating a space for her to begin to see the beautiful being that she was.
Her transformation had begun. That’s what made me cry.
Don’t let anyone, least of all you, tell you that you’re less than a beautiful miracle of life.
Which reminds me of a wonderful song I once heard that I share below…it makes me cry too.
Encourage one another.
I too struggle with the ‘good enough’ theme.
That’s a tough one for me. This is a big part of my self-work.
Love the song/video.
That’s not how I ‘see’ you at all Harriet. All I ‘know’ about you from your writings is an incredibly talented, fearless woman, with an inner and outer beauty that is amazing. 🙂
I think this can apply to how we view our children too. We don’t need to expect them to be perfect. To aim to raise a “good enough” child is an expectation that doesn’t pressure children to be more than they are not. Thanks for this reminder!
Good point Victor. We’re all more than good enough, as I view it, and our kids especially so. 🙂
We need to remind ourselves, often.
be good to yourself
A wonderful message! I find that realizing this is the key to making profound change. A true sense of significance comes when I know I am good enough. We hear all too often that we don’t measure up and don’t have what it takes, so this self-acceptance becomes a must.
So true Joe…we’ve accepted all kinds of ideas about ourselves that simply aren’t true. Time to say, as Louisa is doing..no more. 🙂
I *love* this, Elle, thank you:)
I was raised in chaos and abuse so any fear I had was around “not enough”. I could believe I wasn’t beautiful because I was told I was not, and later when it was physical I couldn’t bear to even look in the mirror. I’ve always had a “pretty face” and even modeled a bit, but I couldn’t see what the camera captured. I decided to step out of that cycle, and do the inner work to heal, and to assist others in healing, so one *can* break those self-limiting thoughts,but it truly does take intent and repeated affirmation. Love and gratitude are amazing tools when we allow them to be:)
Thank you for your wonderful message:)
Oh Joy, how wonderful that you were able to not only step outside the cycle of life you were in but that you’ve used your experiences to support and assist others to do the same.
I remember someone writing that the work required to change our consciousness and therefore our life is the hardest work there is. And whilst I’m not going to accept that…since I’m a lazy bones and don’t want to accept anything that isn’t effortless into my consciousness, nevertheless there are times when I hear a story such as yours that it takes my breath away at where you were and how far you’ve come and the challenges you have left behind.
Thank you so much for your fearless sharing. You encourage us all. ♥
Accepting the truth that our origin is perfection, that we always remain in perfection and that any perceived deviation from that is exactly that – “perceived” – is most worthy of one’s tears of Joy. Particularly as children, we tend to soak up every bit of conversation and energy and store it away for later expression. That is why it is so vital to envelop our young ones in Love and anoint them with Endless Positive Possibilities. Thank you.
Write on Elle !
What a lovely way of expressing it Joseph – love and annoint our children with endless positive possibilities. You are a gem. 🙂