Hands up who has stayed in a relationship, a job or career, or even a friendship longer than they should have?
My hand is up.
Sometimes to get to where we need to go we have to let go of what or who we used to know. Even when it’s scary. Miracles happen we when we find the courage to move on and be brave enough to step onto a new path that leads us to greater happiness and growth in our future.
And sometimes it just isn’t easy to know, or admit to the fact that we’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. That place of letting go of what was and having faith in what will be.
Did I mention scary?
And for those of us who cling to the past too tightly, never giving ourselves space to grow into our future, or able to see that it’s time to move on, here’s 9 ways you can tell for sure.
1. You complain more than you compliment
Maybe in the beginning you couldn’t find words enough to say how great everything was. Now you can hardly find anything nice to say about your former dream job, relationship or great friendship. This makes it time to say goodbye.
2. Your health is suffering
Whether you’re just sick at heart, or physical ailments are bothering you. Nothing is worth losing your health over. I know. I stuck it out in an abusive relationship in the hope that it would get better and also because it’s easier to stay than to leave, I’m sorry to say. 🙂 And I got sick, really sick.
So believe me when I say don’t do this to yourself. Never sacrifice your health for a job or a relationship.
3. You’ve lost your enthusiasm or passion
Be it in a relationship or a career once you become indifferent to the work, or the people, it’s time to take a long hard look at where you are. Enthusiasm is a requirement for success and happiness.
4. Your efforts go unnoticed or unappreciated
Despite all the effort you’re putting into your relationship, friendship or career, nothing is ever enough. When you learn how much you’re worth you’ll become unwilling to be involved with those who you can’t trust enough to respect and care about you. If they’re not respecting and appreciating you, then they don’t deserve to keep you around.
[socialpug_tweet tweet=”You know it’s time to move on when your life is more misery than magic.” display_tweet=”You know it’s time to move on when your life is more misery than magic.”]
5. You can’t wait for the day to be over
Work is so miserable. Yet, at the same time, you really don’t want to go home, or join your friends at your usual haunt. In fact you find any and every excuse to go and do something entirely different. To be somewhere new. This, strangely enough, could be the best news possible. You’ve just been avoiding the truth, that it’s time to move on and that’s hard. But now you know.
6. The fun and laughter have disappeared
It used to be fun. You enjoyed your day, you enjoyed the time with your friends or partner, but now it feels like a chore. Life is more miserable than magical and you can’t remember the last time you laughed out loud. Something’s got to give…just make sure it isn’t your health and happiness.
7. You have to change who you are
In your relationships if who you are isn’t good enough, it’s time to move on. If someone needs you to be someone you aren’t then clearly you don’t belong in one another’s life. Your wellbeing and identity matter. Of course we can all learn and grow, but not at the expense of our very being.
8. You don’t fit into the culture
At work, if you stop being productive, if you’re constantly stressed and negative about your job or you’re uncomfortable about the ethical differences between you and how the company behaves, then you’re not in moral harmony and it’s time to get out. You become stronger when you live in your own integrity. Say aware and you’ll know when it’s time to move on.
9. The form of friendship isn’t what it used to be
We live in an ever changing world. And as unique individuals we are always a work in process and this filters through into every friendship we have. It’s futile to demand that friendships remain the same, we’re pushing against the very nature of an ever changing reality. Sometimes the best way to maintain a forever friendship is to allow it to evolve into the form that it needs to be and let go and move on from the form that it was.
Spiritually speaking
Some of the best moments of your life haven’t happened yet and the only barrier to ensuring you experience them in all their wonder is you.
Arguing for your limitations, keeps them in place. Feeling not good enough or unworthy limits you from leading the best life possible. The one you are designed to live.
Being unwilling or not being able to to move on when you know you need to isn’t the end of the world, it just means your fear today is greater than your dream for tomorrow.
So even if you can’t make instant changes to your sense of self or let go of all those limiting beliefs that keep you in place, you can begin. Remember that small drops of water wear down big stones.
You may not get there tomorrow, but you will be closer than you were yesterday.
Encourage one another.
Love Elle
xox
17 Comments
These are so helpful, Elle. I know I hesitate to move one, especially when I have a lot invested in the current situation. Thanks for the nudge and clearly guidelines.
Wow…so true Sandra…investments of time or the heart and soul are hard to walk away from…but oh so necessary for our long term health and wellbeing. 🙂
Great post Elle. So many of us carry on with things long after we should have moved on. Facing up to when something’s not working is so difficult, but can free us up for a whole new set of awesome.
That’s so true Ellen…and sometimes…our head hasn’t quite caught up with our heart. 🙂
There does come a time when people have to step away from a situation that is no longer working. I like your ways to tell if it is time. When you know stepping away is going to be painful, it is easy to keep hanging on, so always good to have the nudge to move on when needed. Thanks!
So true Cathy. It is easier to hang on, even when it’s hurting us on a daily basis. Moving on can be hard. 🙂
Very sage advice, Elle, I knew it was time for me to get out of an ownership situation in a yoga studio when I found myself doing some of these. I saw more to criticize than compliment and it just wasn’t fun anymore. I still love and do yoga about every day – as a student not as an owner.
It makes all the difference. 🙂
Awesome you Debbie…that you got yourself out of a situation that must have been unhappy. 🙂
So timely for me and I am looking at moving forward fearlessly and that means letting go especially for me now of Social media groups and email that really just distract me and can be a great time waster as well as energy drain . Great post thank you xxx
I know what you mean Suzie…we just have to prioritize. 🙂
This is such a gentle nudge in the right direction for me Elle. THank you for sharing this perspective.
xoxo, Z~
Hi Zeenat…glad you enjoyed it dear one. 🙂
I read your article and loved it..I’m almost 50, just lost my job that I hated and was told by the Dr to leave cuz of the nite shift and stress..I do believe everything happens for a reason..A very close friend of mine who after 30 years of marriage is getting a divorce and offered me to come stay with her till I get on my feet.. The problem is I will miss my grand daughter…
Hi Peggy…I’m so sorry that life is so tough for you right now. I’m a great believer in something wonderful always being on it’s way, not matter what life looks like. So keep your eyes open dear one…and let me know when it arrives. I’m believing for you. 🙂
I know I have to move on from a relationship, but find it hard, but I have to do it for myself.
Maybe this article had some good points. I was too busy distracted by the terrible grammar. Your vs you’re.
Ouch Jemima – apologies – it’s actually a typo and I’ve gone back and corrected both of them. I too get distracted by incorrectly spelled or misused words. Thanks for the heads up.