How often have you wanted to change something in your life, but it didn’t work out as you planned? Something got in the way.

Don’t feel too badly about this. It’s happened to us all.  And speaking for myself. More than a few times.

But what was it that really stopped you?

If others would just keep their promises, if business would just look up, if the dog or the kids didn’t need so much attention, that might help. If it wasn’t winter, if it wasn’t summer that might help.

We can come up with all the excuses on the planet, but truth be told everything outside of ourselves is in the minor leagues when it comes to getting the change we want.

What’s happening on the outside matters much less than what’s happening on the inside.  You are the one and only key to getting the change you want.  Write that down. Keep it handy. Remind yourself regularly – “I am the key to my future.” The magic is in you.

1. The magic of awareness

The gooey dessert doesn’t get onto your plate accidentally. 

The game you chose to play instead of finishing your project didn’t ask you to you play.

You’ve got a habit!

And like all habits, it creates automatic actions. 

The good news is that every habit, be it helpful or hurtful is totally dependent on you for it’s survival. But without some form of intervention from you, they’ll keep on running the show and happily come between you and the changes you’d like to see in life.

Remember that the reason some people are more successful at life than others is because they have formed successful habits.  The trick is to replace your old harmful habits with new and better ones. Not all at once, just one at a time can make a difference.

If you’d like a hand with this, try the swish technique that I wrote about here.

2. The magic of enthusiasm

Jim Rohn said it so well

“To have more become more.” 

It’s no good tackling the problem with the same self that created it in the first place. 

What lights your fire? What gets you out of bed in the morning?  What are you deeply, truly passionate and enthusiastic about?  Get busy creating your passionate vision for the future and you’ll be creating the foundation for determining where you’re going. Enthusiasm will guide you to live your truth and conquer your fear.

When my granddaughter was 4 she was enthusiastic about the idea of holding a snake until the moment came. She did it anyway…gingerly taking hold of the snake whilst holding her breath. And then she smiled. And said  “I’m not afraid anymore”.  Enthusiasm triumphs over fear.

3. The magic of working on yourself

If you never take chances you’ll never know what you’re capable of. 

Whatever you think you can do to make tomorrow better than today, you can never do more than improve yourself. 

Behave as though you were the most amazing person in the world, deserving of only the very best. Use every day to grow and develop and change the way you view the world.  Read books, take seminars, listen to podcasts and begin to create a new perspective on life.

How you think, how you see the world, how you react to challenges has far more potential to ruin a great future than any obstacles you might encounter.

Once you begin to change the way you view, judge and determine the important things in life, life completely changes.

4. The magic of confidence

We all lack confidence some times, in some areas of life. But what if you could convince yourself that regardless of what happened you would always feel good?

Doesn’t sound that easy, right?

But confidence is just another mind-set. And  if we can change our minds we can change our lives. Don’t rely on outside factors to feel confident about who you are and what you do.  The power is in you. Hang on to it.

If you’ve been neglecting to get things done, the way you see yourself will be diminished. If you keep taking the easy way out of situations, the message to yourself is loud and clear…you don’t believe in yourself.

There are times when we fall short in the self-belief arena and if that happens to you, make sure you surround yourselves with others who believe in you.

At 15 my daughter didn’t believe she was smart enough to go to University, and was talking about leaving school early.  The family believed in her. Her school believed in her. And our belief culminated in an education she hadn’t believed was possible.

When people you trust and respect tell you how capable you are, you begin to believe it. Mind over matter is a powerful tool. Use it to your advantage.

Finishing Touches

In this super TED video, Matt Cutts of Google fame talks about boosting his confidence and creating new habits. He even makes it fun!

 Anytime you find it a challenge to get what you want, or you’ve lost your way, remember that all the answers you need lie within you. You are a natural born creator with more gifts than you can possibly use in this lifetime.  Don’t struggle, consult your inner wisdom, it knows what you need to do.

Encourage one another

Love Elle


P.S. If you enjoyed this article and you can think of anyone else who might be encouraged by it, please share.


Elle Sommer is the author of 4 books and a workbook. Her latest publications are a series called The Power of Consciousness, and you will find all three books in this trilogy now available on Kindle. She shares quotes, inspiration and positive vibes on Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest. And her greatest desire is to encourage and inspire others to create not just a good life, but a phenomenal life.


  1. Great points here Elle! I find that having confidence in yourself is very important and necessary. After always doing something other than what I was supposed to do, I realized that my actions were related to my lack of confidence. Because I didn’t really believe I could pull what I wanted off, I did other things that were much easier.

    Your daughter was lucky to have her family support her in such a way. Having other behind you like that is incredible.


    • ElleSommer

      Hi Lea…self confidence and believe in self changes everything doesn’t it? And being aware, as you are now is the biggest factor in getting the life you want today. I hope you acknowledge how great you are for being that aware. 🙂

  2. I love the idea of thinking of your abilities to change, create, and better ourselves as magic. After all, that’s kind of what it is, right? I always say that neuroplasticity is the super power we all have. Our habits do make our lives – and brains, which is OK, because as you pointed out, we can make our habits. Thanks for the tips.

    • ElleSommer

      It is magical Debbie…and I love that science and spirituality are in harmony…as they should be. Different words, same effects. Love the mysteries of life. 🙂

  3. It’s so true! The magic is in me. I’m working to fully integrate that truth each day. I love these four magical ways you show us how to do that. I’m sharpening each one of them!

    • ElleSommer

      Here we are again Sandra on the same page from a different perspective. All about the magic in life. I think if we live from the heart, magic occurs in our life so naturally…and we get to live in the most wonderful flow. 🙂

  4. Love the Jim Rohn quote we all can embrace that . Yes the more we become the more magic there is in the world, not to mention our own lives. Love this post Elle, food for thought for me here xxoo

    • ElleSommer

      Hi Suzie…Jim Rohn makes everything seem so simple, which I suppose it is really…we tend to over complicate and then lose the magic. 🙂

  5. These are some lovely ways for us to get accountable to ourselves and take a little control. I love the idea of magic too, such an evocative word!

    • ElleSommer

      Thanks Ellen. Self accountability isn’t the easy thing to do. It’s so much easier to make excuses…but I’ve found even a little can go a long way. 🙂

  6. Joseph Appaloosa

    Another great one, Elle.
    ” I AM the key to my future” ! That is the heart of the biscuit right there !
    “Enthusiasm triumphs over fear” ! We can all use the bravery of a four year old !
    “Use everyday to grow and develop and change” ! It’s not a groove, it’s a a rut !
    Thankyou !
    Write on, Elle !

    • ElleSommer

      You always manage to get to the ‘heart of the biscuit’ Joseph. Would love to have you write a guest post! Let me know when you’re available. 🙂

    • ElleSommer

      Hi Zeenat, how lovely to see you. It’s always good to be reminded of the magic that we are! And that Ted video was pretty cool. 🙂

  7. Shivi Sharma

    The most amazing article I have read till date. Despite failures how one can rise. I got the much needed motivation. Thanks a lot 🙂

    • Hello Shivi – so glad you enjoyed the article and much appreciation for you taking the time to say so. 🙂

  8. Yes like Shivi Sharma said, this article is really good for motivation and I loved it so much.Thank you for writing this ElleSommer.

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