There’s one tricky belief we have to manage and overcome before we can achieve our hearts desires. And believe it or not, it stems from fairy tales!

Did you ever read a fairy tale as a child and imagined that everyone in the world had a happy ending?

I know I did, and maybe you did too? Or it just became an idea that was planted in our minds without even a thought.

However, as we grow older, we come to realize that life isn’t a fairy tale and that achieving our goals is more complex than a story in a book. And sadly, happy endings aren’t guaranteed.

We start to understand that we must face one tricky belief before achieving our dreams.

Often, this journey involves confronting a subconscious belief that someone or something external will save us, a belief that we may not even be aware we hold.

And no matter how much we wish for external circumstances to change, the truth is that we are the architects of our future and that the magic to achieving our goals lies within us.

It’s not a knight in shining armor or a fairy godmother that will save us, but our own abilities and determination.

Self-Reliance: Why Depending on Others Can Be a Recipe for Disappointment

Have you ever trusted someone only to be let down?

I can’t speak for you, but I know I have.

People may have the best intentions, but they are fallible and imperfect. They have their own lives to navigate, and their priorities may not always align with ours.

So even if they promise to be there for us, there may come a time when they can’t deliver on that promise. It’s just human nature.

We are all guilty of letting others down, even those we love.

Despite our best efforts, we may still disappoint them.

We forget a special occasion, fail to meet a deadline, or can’t be there when they need us the most. We may not intend to let them down, but it happens.

But here’s the thing: relying solely on others for our success is not a sustainable strategy.

We need to trust ourselves and our abilities to overcome obstacles.

However, that doesn’t mean we should cut ourselves off from others altogether.

While self-reliance is key to achieving our goals, we can still connect with like-minded individuals who can support us in our journey.

So, the next time you feel like you’re relying too heavily on someone else, remember this: people are temporary and unreliable.

The truth is that unlike fairy tales, relying too heavily on others is not a sustainable strategy for success.

But the good news is, you have the power to manage and overcome this belief on your own.

And here’s a powerful tool that you can use to begin:

Decreeing: The Power of Our Words

Coming from a country where kings and queens issued decrees for centuries, I’m very aware of royal proclamations.

Not that modern monarchs have this ability – good job, too, since those decrees didn’t always work out so well for everyone.

The phrase “off with their heads” was commonplace, and not just in fairy tales like Alice in Wonderland.

And for those of us who were pretty invested in fairy tales when we were young, you’ll remember how often the King – or the handsome Prince in some cases – would decree something, making proclamations about glass slippers and such.

But I never realized how much we decree things over our lives.

Our words have power, and we often underestimate their impact on our reality. What we say to ourselves, and others can shape our beliefs and determine our actions.

You are the King or Queen of your reality and every time you speak aloud or to yourself you are creating your future.

Building Bridges to Connect with Others

As the sole architects of our life, we must learn to rely on ourselves to achieve our goals and become more aware of where that one tricky belief is getting in our way.

But coping with setbacks and challenges doesn’t mean we’re entirely on our own. Building walls around ourselves isn’t a great way to achieve our dreams.

Warren Buffet, one of the most successful investors in the world has acknowledged the importance of support and collaboration in his success.

And if you shut yourself off from others you are limiting your growth and missing out on the opportunity for valuable connections that could help you achieve your goals.

Reach out to others and create new connections. Why go through life alone when there are people out there who share your goals and aspirations.

So the next time life goes wrong or challenges seem overwhelming, don’t retreat behind a wall. Instead, connect with like-minded individuals because we may not need saving, but sometimes a little support can make all the difference.

No One is Coming to Save Us: Taking Control of Our Lives

Remember, no one is coming to save us from our lives or ourselves.

It’s up to us to take control and manage our own lives. And that’s why it’s important to seek out mentors and like-minded collaborators who can support and guide us along the way.

Although, true confession; when I was a little girl, I dreamed of a hero coming along and showering me with chocolate, thinking it would be cool.

But over the years, I’ve been able to live a life I love for myself because I focused on the gifts I already had without needing someone to send them my way.

And as you do the same with the gifts you’ve been given, you’ll realize that just about anything is possible.

So instead of feeling discouraged by the truth that no one will save us, it’s empowering. It frees us from waiting, hoping, and wishing our lives away.

You’ve got this if you want it and can move beyond that one tricky belief

I get that making changes can be challenging.

And believe me, my particular way isn’t the only way you can move beyond wishing and hoping that someone or something will step up and make life easier for you.

It’s just one way I know from personal experience.

And all I can do is share what I’ve done and experienced. And although I don’t know you, I know you have particular skills and talents that are ideal for creating the life you love.

You could tell me that many people struggle to escape their current situation. And I agree with you. But it takes work for all of us. And having said that, I still believe you can take control of your life from now on.

The least you can do is try unless you’d prefer to continue to wait in the hope that someone or some external force will magically transform your life.

So why not get going and take control of your life, and make your dreams a reality. The world is waiting for you.

Encourage one another.

Love Elle


Photo by Jacub Gomez on Pexels


Elle Sommer is the author of 4 books and a workbook. Her latest publications are a series called The Power of Consciousness, and you will find all three books in this trilogy now available on Kindle. She shares quotes, inspiration and positive vibes on Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest. And her greatest desire is to encourage and inspire others to create not just a good life, but a phenomenal life.


  1. I never thought about how the belief that we have to ‘earn’ success could be holding me back. It makes sense that we should focus on taking action towards our goals instead of waiting for some external validation. Thanks for the insight!

  2. I love the idea of replacing the word ‘failure’ with ‘learning opportunity.’ It’s such a simple shift in mindset, but it can make all the difference in how we approach our goals. I’m excited to implement this in my own life!

  3. Greggos

    Hello Elle –
    Thank you for this article.
    “Everytime we speak aloud or to ourselves ” , ah yes our self-dialogue diet that feeds the creative spaces in our minds that construct our experiences. What a great reminder to be aware of what we are ingesting.
    “No one is coming to save us”, sad but true as we can only truly save ourselves. However with that typed, we should always be willing to accept external help, just not necessarily always expect it.
    “The least you can do is try”, I have a friend who has been known to tell me that the road to perfection is always under construction. But we must try !
    You are a treasure !

  4. Elle, This is such an important message. I took those fairytales seriously. I thought I was the princess that would be rescued, saved, and then live happily ever after. But you are so right! We can rely on no-one for certain. We have to be in charge of our own lives. Perfectly said!

    • Those fairy stories definitely fill our minds Sandra. And look you, I grew up expecting something similar in my world. What a shock to discover, that it’s up to me to be in charge of my life, but once I got going with that perspective I started to see how competent and capable I was. Not in all areas, sometimes I would need a hand, but then when I asked, there was someone who could give me a clue as to where to go next!

  5. I have just become self-reliant in the past decade – better late than never. It feels great. As you say:

    “So instead of feeling discouraged by the truth that no one will save us, it’s empowering. It frees us from waiting, hoping, and wishing our lives away.”

    …but it is also tremendously scary. I have found that a big part of it is believing in myself and the universe.

    • Hi Debbie, it is definitely scary, but once we begin, we begin to find we are more capable than we ever gave ourselves credit for.

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