Silhouette of woman and outdoor pavilion during sunset at Bali beach Indonesia

[success]Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it. ~ Maya Angelou[/success]

Some days you’re just going to be stumbling around in the dark. Some days everything that could go wrong does. Some days life seems like an endless roller coaster ride, up one minute and down the next.

Let’s be honest. Even a Pollyanna like me has days that are pretty disheartening.

But I have a few tricks up my sleeve, so the next time a rotten day arrives just keep going…and to make it a little easier here’s a few things I like to remember, to help turn the page on those disheartening, down days.

1. Stop waiting…

for someone to arrive, something to show up, blue skies,a better day, for life to fall into place. Don’t wait for a reason to be happy, begin to make things happen today, begin to make the most of your moments and be okay with not being certain what the day will bring, decide that something wonderful is heading your way.

Don’t wait for those precious moments, create them.

2. Always expect the best…

Profound possibilities await; bear in mind ‘anything you dwell upon grows in your reality.’ Anything that you think about long enough and hard enough eventually becomes a part of your mental processes, exerting its influence and power on your attitude and your behavior.

Those who study expectancy say we’ve spent our whole lives becoming conditioned, and as life progresses our mind learns what to expect next and so we often achieve exactly what we anticipate. Better anticipate the best you can come up with!

3. Don’t try…

to change your life all at once. Don’t set yourself up for failure. Massive change can arrive one small step at a time, one small change at a time. But do begin. A year from now you’ll wonder why you didn’t start today. Stop fretting about yesterday and wasting your energy on what might have been or what was. Every day gives you an opportunity to use your creative powers to realize your dreams.

Today make the decision to keep your attention on creating a new ‘what is’.

4. Believe that all things are possible for you…

Not a few things, not some things…but just about everything. Dream big dreams and let all your limiting beliefs fall away until your vision in all it’s glorious detail is revealed.  And then give yourself the love, energy and encouragement needed to have your dreams become your reality.

Your success lights the way for others.

5. Don’t be paralyzed…

by the fear of the unknown…change is a challenge for us all. But it’s only when we stop talking about wanting our life to improve and begin taking action to make it happen that it becomes less fearful. Making the decision you want something, more than you’re afraid of reaching for it, inspires the universe to help you attain it.

6. It’s the easiest thing in the world to judge…

and to fault find, with yourself and others, and the only reward for this is the likelihood you’ll end up feeling badly about it.

When you find yourself judging less and encouraging more you know you’re part of the solution and not part of the problem.  You’ve become a light in the world. Now instead of pointing fingers you’re holding out a hand. Encourage everywhere:  in families, at work, with friends.. And who knows, the day may come when you’ll be glad of a helping hand yourself.

7. You’ve heard it said…

that sticks and stones may break your bones but words will never hurt you. It isn’t true. Words can break your heart and damage your spirit. Keep away from those who constantly criticize and focus on all the wrongs in the world. Keep away from those who speak only of defeat and failure. Success and joy and fulfillment won’t be companions on their journey for long.

Instead, surround yourself with those who encourage, who lift your spirits, who help you get to your feet when you’ve fallen.

8. Understand happiness…

is  a state of mind, not a change in circumstance. Happiness isn’t something that’s out there, something we find. Something we carry in our pockets and pull out when we need it.

If you wait for this or that to happen before you can be happy, you’ll be waiting a long time because once this or that arrives, there’s always the next this or that before you can be truly happy.

9. Learn the common habits…

of successful, happy people. One simple thing they do is turn anxiety and worry into a greater belief in themselves.

Forget the size of the problem. It doesn’t really matter how big or seemingly impossible something seems to be, there’s little point in worrying. One thing we can all be grateful for is that nothing lasts forever, not even the challenges of life.

As you begin to appreciate how incredible and remarkable you are, you’ll discover you too can reframe any situation and turn towards the light of solutions.

Learn to count your joys as frequently as you count your troubles and you’ll be well on your way.

10. If you’re not living the life…

you truly want maybe it’s time to stop clinging to what you already have.

It’s up to you to decide how your life needs to be.

Practice being more curious. Be willing to undertake a new adventure.

Step out from the shadow of your past and get some new ideas from which to think. Anything you think about often enough soon begins to influence your attitudes until eventually you’ll find yourself taking new action. You’ll find yourself saying yes to a new way of living.

11. Let your enthusiasm loose…

It’s a contagious quality that inspires everyone around you to support your ventures and become your greatest cheerleaders. And it inspires you to draw upon your inner creative power.

You were born an original, a never before seen person on planet earth. Born with dormant, unimaginable, abilities and talents, just waiting for brilliant ideas and enthusiasm to get them blooming.

Break free from the crowd and start moving. Make today your day.

Begin with how to make tomorrow better than today.

Begin at the beginning, start something.

Finish what needs to be finished.

Start down the path and stay with it, until you’ve gone as far as you can on that particular pathway.

Move your dreams into today and begin to live them and you’ll steadily begin to fulfill them. Instead of seeing things as difficult, focus your energy on what’s good and valuable and grow it.

You can do this. Difficult days don’t have to get in the way of a spectacularly successful life.

Connect with your humanity. Say I love you a lot. Say I’m sorry when you need to. Tell someone how proud you are of them and you’ll trigger a spark in you and everyone you meet that leaves the world a better place than you found it. Dark days won’t last long in the light of  loving kindness.

I’d love to hear your take. With so many ways to live a successful life, I’m interested to hear how you continue to be happy regardless of any discouragement thrown your way.

Please share your experiences in the comments below. We’re all ready to learn from you…your ideas could spark a breakthrough for us all.

If you enjoyed this article, please share on your favorite social network. Each share or like helps to reach more people who might be looking for a little practical and positive encouragement in their life. Let’s all…

Encourage one another.

Love Elle


Elle Sommer is the author of 4 books and a workbook. Her latest publications are a series called The Power of Consciousness, and you will find all three books in this trilogy now available on Kindle. She shares quotes, inspiration and positive vibes on Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest. And her greatest desire is to encourage and inspire others to create not just a good life, but a phenomenal life.


  1. I found this article to be very helpful and enlightening. One thing I do to stay happy and encouraged is to encourage others. I learn new techniques in self development and read articles such as this as a reminder that I create my own happiness, not my situation, circumstances or others so thank you for this valuable information. Abundant blessings

    • ElleSommer

      Hi Ronda, I love that as you encourage others you encourage you too. It’s so true! And keeping yourself immersed in personal development is a great technique for being focused on the good things in life. Thank you for sharing your ideas with the rest of us. We learn so much from each other. 🙂

  2. Dear Elle,

    I like this in particular: “…let all your limiting beliefs fall away…” It’s a good message for me right now.

    I always try to remember that everything is impermanent, I’m responsible for my own mind and my own life, and the most important thing is how I respond rather than what happens.

    • ElleSommer

      That’s so true Sandra, our reactions to live form our very next experiences, we need to make them good. I always appreciate your perspective on life dear one. 🙂

  3. When days like those come, it’s best to not stop. Keep going and things will change. But sometimes, you have to let go, too.

    • ElleSommer

      I’m a great believer in letting go when necessary Matt. Relaxing into what is somehow makes life a lot easier. Appreciate you sharing your viewpoint with us. There’s always another tool for our toolbox we can pick up and use from one another. 🙂

  4. These are some great tips, Elle. I try to always expect the best. You may never know when something bad is going to happen, but having a positive mindset will always give you a head start. For example, I always start my day by saying, “Today is going to be a good day.” Now, sometimes it is and sometimes it isn’t, but at least I’m allowing for that possibility.

    • ElleSommer

      How great Melissa…that positive mindset is going to pay huge dividends. Love the way you start your day…you’re a role model for us all. 🙂

  5. Very well done. By George you have hit all the bases. I have been living with a painful knee for the last few days and this post renewed my spirit and reminded me who I was – magnificent!

    • ElleSommer

      Glad it hit the right note for you Dore. And yes, you are magnificent. 🙂

  6. I really liked this post. I appreciate the effort made in producing such a great lesson. These days I am enjoying this blog!

    Thank you indeed

    • ElleSommer

      Hi Nema – so glad you enjoying the blog, it’s lovely to have you here. 🙂

  7. I totally agree with you Elle!

    Personally, I’ve experienced the frustration that is caused when things don’t happen the way you want or when you are forced to adjust to random changes.

    Just like your first point, now I’ve realized that waiting for that change or chance and doing nothing until it arrives is useless. Though we do need some changes to happen in order to start truly achieving, we can always start doing something – no matter how small – in whatever situation we are. Also, trying to change everything at once seems so overwhelming that you are simply unable to move! So, it’s better to start with that one small step.

    Similarly, often we don’t start because we are waiting for the time when we’ll feel more confident or comfortable with facing our fears. While the fact is, we never do get comfortable unless we start!

    Thanks for sharing these amazing points! Have a great weekend 🙂

    • ElleSommer

      Thanks Atiba…seeing the world through our eyes is a real treat and I’m glad you’re a part of our encouragement community. Thank you. 🙂

      • You are welcome Elle, and thank you too!

        I am also glad to be a part of this community, and to have found an amazing person like you!

        Have a great day 🙂

  8. Wow! another very encouraging post. I couldn’t agree more, we all have our down days and sometimes we feel so disheartened and could not possibly move on, having a positive perspective always brighten our path, though it does not always end up the way we want it but we will always have the strength to move forward. I’ll be sharing this with my friends. Thank you very much. Great article!

  9. Thanks Elle for another great reminder. With the new year upon us it is only fitting to leave all the negativity and distractions I the past and embrace the new year. This is my year and I am excited and happy. The information you have given me will be instrumental in reminding me of how much I have within me and how much I can do.
    I will let my enthusiasm go and I refused to be ever paralyzed by fear ever again. Thanks again for a great post and I look forward to being with you in the new year.

    • ElleSommer

      Can’t wait to hear how your year unfolds Rose. With your definiteness of purpose, I can only see wonderful things transpiring. Do keep us posted with what you’re up to and how you’re making life work the way you want it to. 🙂

  10. The other day I realized I sometimes think I can’t get to working on the things I would like to because I have so many other demands on my time from what other people expect me to be doing. I stopped myself in my tracks and reminded myself that I am not a victim, and no one is preventing me from moving forward but me. I sat down right then, and made the time to write a few emails I had been putting off. It felt so good to get something done because I decided to, rather than procrastinate on it with the excuse of being victimized.

    • ElleSommer

      Oh so true Annie! Who hasn’t been there and done that. Lots of applause for stopping everything and taking the time to attend to some things that were important to you. It makes all the difference in the world. Woohoo Annie. 🙂

  11. I agree with you.
    I really want people wake up that they must to take action to get things they want in life instead have lack of believe in themselves, everyone also deserve with good things but they must efforts, must go out to find it and don’t give up in process.
    Thank for share great post.

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Chu Nam…I’ve noticed that old saying when the pupil is ready the teacher appears, so I would say your desire that others wake up to their amazing potential will lead those who are ready, to find you. 🙂

  12. I really your words “Don’t try to change your life all at once. Don’t set yourself up for failure”.
    My experience on stop die myself by decide do things with my best, my ability, my talent, my education to give values to other people, with that work help me gain more confident about myself and my worth. I choose to do things make me feel good and happy even simple is relax or sleep enough when I feel tired, with that work help me be productive, highest energy and make other feel good while work with me.
    Thank for share!

    • ElleSommer

      Hi Chu and welcome! You make some great points for us all to ponder and I appreciate you joining in the conversation. Hope to see you again soon. 🙂

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