What makes you thrive and live your most passionate life?

What does it take for you to lead the good life, the joyful life, the most successful life for you?

And what gets in the way?

Here are some ideas worth considering.

1. Free yourself

Life and people are always changing, and the more you try to control things the more they control you. If you want to have peace and harmony in your life you must set yourself free. Stop allowing the people and experiences in your life to control the way you feel.

2. Let go of regrets

What you’ve learned is more important than the mistakes or poor choices you’ve made.  We all have another chance to do it better, to make sure we learn from the choices and experiences of today. We have tomorrow.  Leave regrets behind, laugh at the things you got wrong, celebrate the life ahead.

3. Take ownership

The easy way through life is to look around to see who we can blame for our misfortune, or back luck. Take ownership of your life. It doesn’t belong to anyone else.  Are you able to see your contribution in the experiences you have? Life continually reflects back to us our thoughts about our relationships, our jobs, our abilities.  No blame, no shame, simply ownership of your part in your life.

4. Make way

Let go of the old to make way for the new. There have been times in my life when I’ve allowed my opinions and beliefs to get in the way of the dynamic journey that life is. That’s how we get stuck. That’s how we stop dreaming and doing. Let the past stay there. Get back into the flow of joyful thinking, knowing that everything that lies ahead of you is not in your old and outworn beliefs.

5. Release judgement

Allow others to respond to life in their own way. Give them the space to be themselves and be sure to give yourself the same gift.  Appreciate that life is a privilege and when you come across others who respond to situations entirely differently than you, don’t make them wrong, don’t criticize. Empathise with their perspective on life, it might be a difficult path that they’re walking right now.

 6. Do the right thing

Do what you know is right, even if no-one else does.  Don’t fall into the trap of only doing what is convenient or most helpful for you and even if your actions won’t change the world,  you haven’t allowed the world to change you.  A rich, fulfilling life comes less from saying the right thing and more from doing it.

7. Become unstoppable

It’s easy to sit idly back and let time slip through our fingers. After all life isn’t that bad!  Generally it’s pretty easy to waste our time, and before too long we’ve managed to convince ourselves that this is the very best that we can be, the very best we can do. Not true! Today, be fierce, be strong. Don’t let second-guesses or doubt dampen your enthusiasm or passion for life.

8. Step out of your regular lifestyle

Eventually that comfort zone, that complacency that we all experience, leads to unhappiness, boredom and frustration.

Deep down inside, you know you were put on this earth with amazing capabilities. It’s the times you are way outside your element that you discover parts of you that you never knew were there. An amazing life exists one step out of your comfort zone. Take it and you’ll find you’re not an ordinary person after all, but an extraordinary one, designed to be awesome.

9. Let kindness be your guiding light

The choices you make, make you. Enjoy life, travel, read great books, write even greater ones, seek fame, become your greatest self, make a fortune. And throughout it all encourage others, motivate those who are lost or feeling down. Be the one who is remembered for their many acts of kindness.  And should you need an incentive, studies show that kindness boosts your health and immune system. But best of all you’ll feel really great about who you are.

10. Stop the pity parties

Never ask the question “Why did this happen to me?”  It simply creates or reinforces a victim mentality and reduces your power to make changes.  Any time you feel sorry for yourself, any time you find yourself constantly complaining do something different. What has being a victim done for you so far?  Not much! Your complaints and sense of victimhood will never get you to where you want to go. And worst of all your personal power is being handed over to someone or something else. Don’t do this to yourself.

11. Listen and speak from the heart

The best people aren’t afraid to speak from their heart. Sometimes what we need isn’t someone to put things right, isn’t someone with a quick fix but someone who listens with patience and speaks with kindness.  Real personal power comes from putting a voice to your heart and soul. Wherever you go, make sure you’re following your heart, it often knows the best route.

Spiritually speaking

Our inner conversations have remarkable power over our lives, our happiness, our bodies and create our experiences for good or ill.

A great secret to living both joyfully and successfully lies in the power of our attention.

The words we speak, the thoughts we think and the feelings we feel all combine to create the world we live in. So to progress, to joyfully explode your life, don’t accept the world as it currently is. Recreate it through your imagination, through the words you speak to yourself that might not be ‘true’ yet in the world of reality, but will become your truth.

[tweetthis]You are, through control of your imagination, master of your future.[/tweetthis]

Encourage one another.

With love and appreciation,



Elle Sommer is the author of 4 books and a workbook. Her latest publications are a series called The Power of Consciousness, and you will find all three books in this trilogy now available on Kindle. She shares quotes, inspiration and positive vibes on Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest. And her greatest desire is to encourage and inspire others to create not just a good life, but a phenomenal life.


  1. These are really petal-to-the metal ideas, Elle. I’m all for learning to let go of control, surrender, and allowing life to unfold. Getting out of my comfort zone is a bit more challenging for me. Maybe that’s because it’s been difficult most of my life to find a comfort zone. But I definitely appreciate the challenge.

    • ElleSommer

      What a great experience Sandra, never being able to find a comfort zone. It’s all too easy for me I’m afraid! I can become complacent and comfortable in my life at a drop of a hat, and since personal growth is really vital to my wellbeing long term, I’m grateful for everything that gives me that nudge I need to move on – after I’ve stopped to smell the roses! 🙂

  2. Often times, your first point is the most trickiest…Freeing myself is the most difficult task I have ever come across. I let others take control of my life, in effect letting them to decide life for me. Lately, I am trying to make conscious effort to pluck away the negativity that surround my life and, can I just say, the fruit of it is so sweet? Well, at least when I try it… Thank you for this Elle 🙂

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Vinma – yay for you. Nothing quite like the sweet fruit of success. I hope you’re doing a happy dance for being aware enough to do something different. It’s a powerful tool for living more joyously. 🙂

  3. I absolutely loved reading this and I was a bit surprised to find that I’m already practicing most of these. The most difficult ones for me are making way and releasing judgment. My old beliefs trip me up so much because they create so much conflict within me when trying to change different aspects of my life. I’m working on the judgement part and I’ve made some headway but I still have more work to do.

    • ElleSommer

      Good for you Erica – that’s fantastic. I hope you gave yourself a big pat on the back for this. As for the rest, honestly, I don’t think our personal development is ever done. Once we begin to walk that path and realise there’s always another level we can live at, we’ve taken an on-going project. And for me that’s part of the wonder of living and it sounds as though it’s the same for you. 🙂

    • Thanks miss elle for the 11 ways to live a joyful live. I will practice them in my live journey. ❤?

  4. Such an interesting approach to how to live joyful & successful life :-). Thanks for sharing!

    Human Diaries

    • ElleSommer

      Hello there, how lovely to ‘see’ you here and with kind words too. #bonus! 🙂

  5. Couldn’t agree more with every point you made. “You are, through control of your imagination, master of your future.” I’ve just listened to James Allen’s ‘As a Man Thinketh’ and that quote sums it all up. Loved this post!

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Joey…I love that book. Years ago I had it in my car and listened to it every time I drove anywhere. It was like my rolling university on personal development. I could probably still quote pieces of it verbatim. I think it’s time to revisit it, so thanks for the reminder! 🙂

  6. I love that you have kindness in here – but also the fiercer reminder that we need to take accountability and not have a pity party 😉 I don’t listen to my heart as much as I’d like, so I’m going to work on that this week. With love! x

    • ElleSommer

      Hi Ellen, you are one of the kindest people I know, so you’ve clearly got that one down! I’m glad you’re going to turn your heart light on and pay attention to what it’s saying. It won’t lead you down the wrong path in my experience. Let us know how it’s going in the future. I know we’d love to hear about it. 🙂

  7. Love these suggestions, Elle. I know I feel like my life constantly evolving, so important to “Let go of the old to make way for the new.” Resiliency is important to be able to handle the ups and downs of life. Thanks for a great post and many helpful suggestions.

    • ElleSommer

      It’s so true what you say about the constant evolution Cathy. Sometimes I look back a few years and wonder who that person was and what interesting choices she made! 🙂

  8. Every one on the list is so needed to be successful Elle. Amazing as always! Miss you girl!

    • ElleSommer

      Hi Melissa…miss you too, so glad you’re back! 🙂

  9. Hi Elle,

    Great list of strategies! I’m a firm believer that happiness and joy are inside jobs. Anytime we look at outside things or expect others to make us happy we invariably become less happy. My happiness and joy are my responsibility…not anyone else’s. 🙂

    • ElleSommer

      I totally agree with you Peggy. In fact I’d go one step further and say that our life is an inside job! Lovely to have you here to share your wisdom. 🙂

  10. Awesome and I couldn’t agree with you more. It always about the simple things in life. We only have to choose to be happy and that decision allow is enough.
    Thanks for reminding us what truly matters.

    • ElleSommer

      Hi Rose, how are you? It is the simple things isn’t it. You are so spot on. Don’t you think we complicate life much more than we need? 🙂

  11. Joseph Appaloosa

    Yet another great post, Elle !
    To paraphrase part of your post and your friend Ellen – Kindness is a powerful positive life force, for those who wield it as well as those who receive it.
    Recently, I was privy to a conversation of a couple of middle-aged women (one confessed to be 66) and she was the one who said that she made it a point to do at least one mindful act of kindness everyday because it made her life so much brighter. And all I could think was WOW , I’ve got to adopt that habit !
    Write on, Elle !

    • ElleSommer

      Thanks Joseph, I always appreciate seeing you here. I love the story of your ‘eavesdropping’. What a great philosophy on life, one mindful act of kindness every day. Wow, what a difference to our world. 🙂

  12. I enjoyed reading this post Elle. Letting go of past regrets is hard. I have made decisions and choices over the past couple of years I now regret, but know there is always another path. Each regret teaches us a valuable lesson that we learn and grow from.

    • ElleSommer

      Hi Kathy. Everything you say is so true. I think we’ve all made poor choices in our life and no doubt will make more as we go along, but if we can do as you suggest and view each experience as a growth experience we can make it so much easier on ourselves. I appreciate your wise words. 🙂

  13. Wow, this is so good.. I have a serious problem with being judgemental but I know is wrong and I am asking God for the grace to accept people for them and also to be more patient with people and slowly I am being a better person. It is really a better way of living. Thank you for this. I am also into writing on living life joyfully. I am about to start my blog. This post was inspiring. Thanks again.

    • Hi Ruthie, congratulations on starting a blog, it’s a wonderful journey. And how great that you are beginning to set aside judgement, it really isn’t a beneficial energy for living a happy life.

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