As any regular reader of this blog knows…and bless you for that…I’m less than perfect at using the laws of consciousness. I know how they work, I know what to do, I practice using these principles all the time and I catch myself more often when I miss the mark… a good thing…and I’m sooo much better than I used to be, but I still have reactions that are so automatic, that they come and go before I can say Jack Robinson. Hecky doodle, another weed seed planted in a blink of an eye.
Fortunately, just catching our reactions is a great opportunity to uproot that weed seed before it produces rotten fruit, bringing something we could happily live without. We read something in the newspaper that pushes our buttons, or watch something on the telly that is annoying and just accepting or consenting to it on a regular basis is enough for it to become a part of our consciousness, and get it reflected into our world as an event, or a person or a condition.
Self observation is the only way to go folks, because to change our experience of the world, we all know we first have to change the current arrangement of our mind, to change the mental activity that makes us who we are, and gives us what we get. Like queue jumpers for example.
Explanation required. Yesterday we took a trip to Legoland – and not being smart enough to remember to get our tickets before we went, it meant that we ended up in the blazing sun in a huge long queue. And no, it wasn’t comforting to know that tons of other people were equally not smart enough to get their tickets ahead of time.
I was with this one, the four year old, when a family, seemingly coming from nowhere placed themselves between us. I have a thing about queue jumping..don’t judge…I know, I know, I need to let it go and choose some other experience, but I’m not entirely there yet, obviously, because I find queue jumpers at airports, in supermarkets…all over the blooming show.
Ah yes, good question, what’s the common demoninator? Right, that would be me.
So here we are at Legoland and there I am and there’s my queue jumper right on cue. After all where ever I go, there I am, taking everything in my consciousness with me. It really isn’t about the other person, it really doesn’t help to walk away…well okay it does if you’re about to bop them one…but over the long haul, they’re going to show up again, same old experience wearing new clothes.
I keep getting the same old experience in this area, because I’m still the same old me.
I’m ready to open my mouth, probably in my sometimes blunt British way, when My Darling One shows up and suggests, oh so kindly, that I take O.W and sit under the shade of the old oak tree, while he lined up for the tickets. Have I ever mentioned he’s very Zen? I took his advice and off we went. But I’m still feeling put out even as I enjoy the shady, cooler seat.
And then I catch myself.
Ahaa, said I to self, you can stay here in this ‘put out’ state, handing control of your day over to this unknown family, OR you can choose something different. So I chose something different. I chose to let go of having to control the queue, I chose to let go of being controlled by queue jumpers, I took a deep breath and let it all out
For the rest of the day, hot as it was, frayed as some people seemed to be, I only experienced pleasantness. Lots of excuse me’s when someone got in our way, lots of smiles and how are you’s, and yes, lots of sorry’s when someone got ahead of themselves and us in queues.
Hot as it was, it turned out to be a very cool day.
It’s important to change our reactions to all that is unlovely and unacceptable to us, because truth be told the qualities we condemn in others are really in ourselves, in our consciousness. This isn’t as obvious as aha, she must be a queue jumper, I’m not, but somewhere, sometime, I accepted the idea that this happens to me and I pushed against it and consequently continued to experience it. As we change our mind, we can and do change our life experiences.
This is the true secret of forgiveness, for as you forgive others you are forgiven. And we forgive by letting go of condemnation or reaction; then we’re liberating ourselves from the very thing that caused the event in the first place, the mental conversation that took place within us, the beliefs that we’ve fostered, the ideas we’ve accepted or consented to as true. We are free to see the only truth worth knowing…there is no separation…we are all one.
Here endeth my lesson from Legoland.
Encourage one another.
Love Elle.
xoxo
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Elle
20 Comments
You’re such a darling, Elle. I would feel mad too with queue jumpers, and God knows we have them everywhere, at the petrol pump (yeah, yeah, I know you call it something else :D), at the supermarket…everywhere! It doesn’t seem so bad if someone makes a request (I can’t say NO you know, to these things), but when they think it is their birthright, well, that puts up some faded red flags. I usually control myself my reciting a prayer in my head.
I am glad you let go. That’s the best thing to do – best, healthwise, mental and physical 😀 I’ve found that when I fret, I am only messing up my own mood and head.
🙂 Legoland. That sounds like fantasy land to me. I am crazy about Lego and played with the blocks as much as my son did.
Hugs and love, Vidya
Vidya, you always light up my day with your comments. 🙂 Legoland…hmm what can I tell you…okay the kids loved it. “Nuff said? I’m hopeful that that was my last queue jumping experience…I’m so over it!
Vidya Sury=makes my day every time.
Mine too Stewart and welcome to the conversation.
Elle,
This post really resonating with me! You think you know the rules of getting along through life and then wham! Here comes the lesson again! I had one of these lessons, too, which I may post about next! It’s sometimes hard to bring yourself back from the real world into that calm world where nothing bothers you.
Great post!!
xoxo Betsy
So glad you enjoyed it. Please do post about your lesson Betsy. For all of us practitioners of these universal laws, it’s always helpful to see the reflections that other people experience and what tools they used to turn to something better. Well…it helps me. 🙂 And for us all on the path of awareness and practice, that’s exactly what it’s about, the practice. Man, when I look back at my understanding and practice and yes experiences of five years ago, it’s like looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope…it’s so far away. Gotta love it.
Choices, choices everywhere and even when we choose not to make a choice, yep, we just made a choice. I find the awareness that I always have a choice very reassuring. I find making that (hopefully better) choice empowering and liberating. As the old wise master once said” awareness without practice isn’t worth a dang”.
Thank you.
Write on, Elle.
Hello Joseph, nice to have hear from you again. Awareness…love that word…what are we aware of…do we like it or not…awareness is the beginning of all changes in our world.
Elle,
This was wonderful! I love the story. It reminds me of John Kabat Zinn’s book, “Wherever You Go – There You Are.”
If we keep an open mind and see ourselves as the “common denominator” in all our experiences we shall grow and learn these very important lessons.
xoxo,
Angela
I love John Kabat Zinn Angela and you are so right, it’s all us…we make and build our life experience one thought, one feeling at a time. So no point in complaining at what we see. Best just to change those thoughts and feelings. 🙂
Elle…First, I love that you were at Legoland. It seems that all of the elements lined up for you….a hot day and long queues so that you could learn an important lesson.
We all automatically react. But doing the work as you did, catching yourself in action, and then re-adjusting your attitude is awesome. And isn’t it amazing how one smidgen of a difference in our feelings can have such a huge impact.
Learning to forgive others, as you said, is an act of forgiveness towards ourselves.
Another great Elle post….xxoo-Fran
Thank you so much Fran. As for Legoland, with a house full of kids it’s more of a challenge NOT to go! Even though in the moment of reaction it isn’t always fun…catching ourselves and making the adjustment to have a wonderful day anyway, really is the fun part. I love this stuff Fran, I love becoming more aware, I love catching myself and changing myself. And then seeing the new experiences show up. It just gets better and better. 🙂
Sometimes it’s so hard to learn the lessons that others show up to teach us. My last post was on a similar topic (how difficult people serve as our teachers). We’re on the same wavelength!
That’s great how you checked yourself and made a new choice. I’m finding it easier to do the more I practice. I notice when I’m carrying around tension and negativity and make the choice to turn it into ease. Life is so much more fun that way!
Love Legoland!!
We’re definitely on the same page Paige! I loved your last post and highly recommend everyone check it out. 🙂 And you’re so right we get better with practice, and as I said to Fran, it just becomes a fun game to play, with the added bonus of creating a great life for ourselves. Can’t go too wrong, now can we? 🙂
Brilliant! Just brilliant!
Thanks Katie, and welcome to the conversation. Love to hear your experiences, I love that we all encourage each other to expand and learn from one another. 🙂
I came here via Facebook/Simple Mindfulness and am so glad I did! It’s such a good lesson. Your husband is very thoughtful and very aware. But, you did the work…good for you. I loved this line:
“Hecky doodle, another weed seed planted in a blink of an eye.”
It made me laugh out loud!
Love Simple Mindfulness too and I’m happy to make you laugh. Nothing like a good laugh in our day, right? Thanks for joining the conversation, it’s lovely to have you. 🙂
Elle,
Absolutely brilliant, as usual, with your wonderful observation, “It’s important to change our reactions to all that is unlovely and unacceptable to us, because truth be told the qualities we condemn in others are really in ourselves, in our consciousness.” I just love it! Thank your for your continued enlightenment! 🙂
Aww thanks Victor for your kind words. I’m so happy and grateful to have you pop in and join the conversation. 🙂