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Have there been times when you found the idea of sticking up for yourself so uncomfortable or nerve wracking that you just kept quiet?
I know I’ve had those times.
Because truth be told it can be downright hard to find a way to stick up for yourself in some situations.
You might not have a problem sticking up for others…your brat of a little brother for instance, or your kids, or your friends, but…when it comes time to speak up for you..somehow you can’t find the right words.
Maybe you’d like to tell your partner it’s time to take a break from having vacations with the in-laws.
Or you might be really great at handling tough clients on the phone, but when you’d like to ask for a raise at work, suddenly you’re more lamb than lion.
And for some, there’s the conversation you need to have with your surly teenager about their attitude, or grades, or that it’s time they cleaned their room…but then again you remember all the hassle that come with those conversations!
I’ve had times when I should have told the person sitting next to me on a plane that it wasn’t cool to keep sneezing and coughing all over me…but I didn’t!
What we need is a shift in perspective..
1. Your mindset
Like everything in life sticking up for yourself always begins with your mindset. It’s like a two sided mirror…the outer world being a magnified version of the inner.
It’s hard to speak up for yourself when you don’t feel you are worthy. Don’t allow this mindset to be magnified until it crystallizes into others accepting this about you.
It’s easier to be willing to speak up with a mindset that you deserve to get what you’re asking for. And yes…you really do.
2. Your confidence
Once you embrace the mindset of “I deserve this” your confidence level rises so that even if you have to deal with a brutish bully, they will get the message you’re not to be messed with.
And you don’t have to yell or threaten, just believe in YOU.
When you’re confident enough to speak from the heart you’ll discover most people really will listen to what it is you want.
3. Your flaws
Stand up for your flaws. There are no perfect people, just flawed people who deserve to be loved and valued.
Don’t waste any time comparing yourself to others or wishing you were more like them.
When you can find beauty in your weaknesses and accept who you are and who you’re not, you will become the one you are capable of being.
And you’ll find it natural to stick up for yourself. After all you are so amazing!
4. Your quiet strength
You don’t have to shout to be heard. Soft words can move mountains and touch hard hearts.
People hear better when spoken to in a voice of love rather than authority. So temper your words, and keep calm. Unclench your fists, and direct your thoughts towards the outcome you want.
True strength and power isn’t about the volume of a voice. It’s about that sense of inner worth, believing in yourself, believing in your desires and remembering that great things happen from a quiet inside force.
5. Spiritually speaking
The idea that we can’t get what we want surrounds us on a daily basis. But what kind of belief is that? You’re not powerless. In fact you’re infinitely greater than you think.
We live in two worlds at the same time. The inner world of thoughts, beliefs and imagination and the outer world, which is our physical reality.
Our only failure is our inability to feed our inner world with the feeling that we are deserving and that our feelings and opinions are valuable. The evidence of this in your physical world will follow your consciousness that this is so. It can never come before it.
Everything follows consciousness, so assume and maintain the consciousness of your worth and your value and it will be that much easier for you to stick up for yourself.
It’s never too late to be all you can be and to have all you desire. You might not be where you want to be yet, but every day you’ll get closer. Keep assuming the best about yourself and life will express those beliefs in all your experiences.
Encourage one another.