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Have you ever asked yourself, what’s wrong with me?
I know I have a few times over the years.
So many of us spend far too much time thinking there’s something wrong with us. We’re not good enough, we should be doing better, and for some it’s a much deeper sense of being damaged goods.
We often don’t realise that the reason we’re having a challenging time with life is because we’ve stopped liking who we are.
We turn against ourselves, we tell ourselves ‘I don’t fit in, I’m too different’, and this beautiful person that is you suffers a slow, downward slide from a positive mind set to one of negativity and loss of self-confidence.
Learn to listen to a better voice
There is no good reason to keep your attention on the things you don’t want.
The universe might be made up of atoms, but your personal universe is also made up of your stories. The things you say to yourself, the things you think no-one knows about.
But we do.
We know what you tell yourself in secret because we see it in your life experience, we see it in your happiness or misery, we see it in your successes or your failures.
The stories you tell yourself, the way you choose to think is a major factor in how life turns out. The thoughts you continually think will either build you up or tear you down.
It’s a no brainer…
Imagine how much happier your life would be if you followed the practices of successful people and built yourself up.
The champions in our world develop empowering beliefs and invest a lot of time cementing them, mostly through their own self-talk. Step into an empowered state of mind and bring YOUR dreams to life.
Today might be a good day to devote some time to thinking of things that are great about you. Or things you feel happy about. Write them down, it only takes a minute. But do it every day.
You’ll soon know if it’s working when you notice yourself spending less time feeling critical and more time feeling happy and confident. You’re developing the mind set of champions.
Take a sip of a secret elixir
There’s a secret potion you can sip every day. It’s from the cup of gratitude.
Empty your cup of misery, of victim-hood of self-pity, of not feeling good enough, of the idea that there’s something wrong with you and fill your cup with the magical elixir of gratitude.
So much has been written about gratitude. But most of it is ‘gratitude lite’.
The truth is that it’s an immensely powerful force for good in your life and under utilized by most of us. Research by psychologists Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough, discovered that people who consciously focused on things to be grateful for experienced greater emotional well-being, physical health and improved relationships.
The operative word here is consciously. Deliberate and determined focus to integrate gratitude into your daily life becomes an endless wellspring of nourishment for your heart and soul.
Too often we don’t live in a way that gives us what we really need. You can get more of everything when you participate fully in the act of gratitude.
Make a choice that you will start acknowledging all the good in your life. “If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you. It will be enough” said Meister Eckhart, the German philosopher and mystic.
Because everything you say, everything you feel, everything you think produces an effect in your world. When you appreciate and are grateful for what you have and who you are right now, what you have increases and who you are becomes greater.
If you want to live a more contented, abundant life (and who doesn’t?) there are specific disciplines you have to master first. The easiest of them all is the regular practice of gratitude.
Practice thinking about all the good things that happened in the day, look for good news, the things that went well. By speaking words of gratitude over your days you bring more things for you to be love and be grateful for. Gratitude is the foundation of all abundance and self-confidence in your world.
Practice being grateful ahead of time. As children we were taught a prayer before dinner, the one meal we all had together: “For what we are about to receive may the Lord make us truly thankful”. That was my first glimpse into being grateful for something I hadn’t yet received.
Try being grateful for the day ahead of you, picturing what a remarkably happy, successful day it was and you’ll discover it has a dramatic impact on the way your day unfolds. It’s one of the the simplest confidence boosters I know.
The moment you stop doubting and actively seek things to be grateful for is when you truly find the rich and fulfilling life you seek.
Make a pact with yourself
Do you remember how difficult it was to learn to drive? I learned on a stick-shift and it was overwhelming at first. There were so many things to pay attention to and yet it was something I needed to do, wanted to do and had to do and this is the feeling you need to experience in your life.
Life is about finding something you need, want and have to do, then regardless of the overwhelm, do what you did when learning to drive. Practice. That’s how you become the best and and greatest driver of your life. You practice. That’s how bird’s learn to fly.
That’s how we learn reading, writing, playing the piano. Anything.
Work on your personal programme of self-love, self-mastery and growth and make a pact with yourself that you will make choices that cultivate the most powerful expressions of your heart and spirit and fuel the fire of your confidence.
And then stay away from people who don’t support you in being the greatest you possible.
Your life expresses one thing, your state of consciousness. Which consists of your self-talk, your view of yourself, your beliefs and feelings. Never underestimate the power of your inner conversations.
You must choose the state of mind that fulfills your desires; the one that brings greater self-confidence and joy and success, or you will continue to get what you currently have, by default.
And then be patient, be resolute, and remain steadfast in holding the ideal you dream of until you begin to see signs of it becoming a reality.
The real moves in the game of life don’t take place in the outer world of reality but in the inner world of thought, feeling and imagination. Live life like it matters and give the inner game of life all you’ve got. You deserve nothing less. Your world deserves nothing less.
As always I appreciate you being here and would love your take on getting back on track when your confidence has been shattered. Why not make a difference to someone in the Live Purposefully Now family and leave your ideas and wisdom in the comments below. It’s always great to hear from you. Let’s travel our journey of life together.
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Encourage one another.