Do you believe if you work hard you’ll be successful and once you’re successful you can relax and be happy?

It’s a life blueprint practiced by those who’ve come before us and probably those who come after.  The big problem is that it’s not a winning formula.

Be honest. How often have we heard, or thought, once I get more money, once I have the right relationship, after I pass the next exam, or lose that last ten pounds THEN I’ll be happy?

Sometimes we get so caught up in what we’re waiting for that we miss the magic of life.

It’s not easy to stay positive when life is tough and if you’re struggling with life today, remember this, you weren’t created to live too long in negativity and despondency. You are built to win no matter how tough it might seem.

You’ve been blessed with the immeasurable power of change.  You have the capability to change your perceptions, your thoughts, the way you feel, the things you do.

Be patient with yourself and the way life is right now. Beautiful, amazing people don’t just happen, they’ve found their way out of the depths of loss and struggle and defeat and honed their compassion and kindness for themselves and others. And yes, you ARE beautiful and amazing.

1. Practice non attachment

Everyone won’t be the way you think they should be. They won’t do what you think needs to be done. They won’t say what you’d like to hear. Let it go.

Keep some room in your heart for miracles, but always be willing to not be attached to how you think things should be.

If your happiness depends on your expectations of someone or something then you’re in trouble. Remind yourself – if this, or that, doesn’t happen it won’t be the end of the world as you know it.

Stop taking things so personally, and you’ll discover fears and emotions that used to paralyse you, no longer have any power.

2. Don’t wait to be happy

Later this week I’m flying to London to visit my brother.

He’s dying.

It’s far too early in his life for it to be over. Yet it almost is.

Most of us act as though time isn’t passing, as though we’ll be here forever. We won’t. And time passes whether we live fully or not. We should make it count.

And I’m sharing this because I’m reminded how precious life is. And I want to remind you not to waste the gift of living; be grateful for every moment you get to spend with those you love. Think of what a precious thing it is to get up every day and breathe in the sweetness of the morning.

It’s heart wrenchingly sad for me and truth be told I’d rather stay right here and pretend it isn’t happening. But knowing myself, I know I won’t find peace by avoiding what’s happening in my life.

And I know that for me, facing the choices between what’s right and what’s easy can be the hardest thing, but I don’t want to look back and say, I wish I’d done that. I’d much rather say I’m glad, I did that, it was a good choice.

Do everything you can to expand yourself, and your heart, then go and do something wonderful with your precious life. Don’t wait.

3. Take a front row seat

how to live the life you want

You naturally want to live a life that’s great for you. To do this, you need to know who you are.

You’re totally and absolutely unique, there’s no one in the Universe quite like you and it’s time to make peace with who you are if you want to experience contentment.

You and you alone make the decision as to how you view the experiences in your life and it’s important to know who you are, not to judge, not to focus on your flaws and imperfections, but to discover who you want to be and decide if you’re living by choice or chance.

When you see imperfections, rejoice in them, they’re your best tools to help you find your inner gold and discover your passions.

Don’t wait for the un-lived life to cry out for your attention, dig out your buried treasure of talents and resources now, don’t let them die without ever being used.

Act as though you matter, because you do. Make sure you’re living the life you want to live and not one that others want for you. Get out there and make your dreams come true today.

4. Be compassionate

It’s great to stand up for yourself and it’s good for you to stand up for others. We can’t fix the world, but we can make a difference when we’re willing to look out for others. Not just those we’re close to but those who need a kind word, or a helping hand.

As we help others achieve their dreams amazing things happen. We achieve our own. When life is tough don’t sit around moping, make the most of your days.

Every day you’re making an impact on the world around you, and it’s up to you to decide what that impact is.

Make your success more than what you accomplish in your life, also make it about what you inspire and encourage others to do with theirs. You’ll be glad that you did.

5. Spiritually speaking

Don’t diminish your blessings by comparing them to the blessings of others. Be content with where you are while still allowing your desire for new things to flourish. Love without fear. Forgive easily. Be kind. Accept your shortcomings. Be generous with hugs. Respect differences. Laugh often. Chase your dreams. Stop waiting to be happy. Take the rough with the smooth. Look after your health. Keep learning and growing and live each day to the fullest.

I bet you have some interesting things to add to these thoughts. Please do share your wisdom and insights in the comments below…it’s always great to hear from you.

You know how much I appreciate you being here.  I don’t get far without you sharing my articles with your friends and colleagues and I thank you for that. I’m grateful you’re in my corner. 

Encourage one another.

Love Elle



Elle Sommer is the author of 4 books and a workbook. Her latest publications are a series called The Power of Consciousness, and you will find all three books in this trilogy now available on Kindle. She shares quotes, inspiration and positive vibes on Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest. And her greatest desire is to encourage and inspire others to create not just a good life, but a phenomenal life.


  1. sandra webster

    Oh so sorry to hear your brother has ill health elle..your words do inspire me to try and practice what you preach..Although tomorrow comes and I try not to forget your words of wisdom..big hug to you elle..and all the best..

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Sandra and thank you for taking the time to leave your kind thoughts. Glad you are doing what you need to do to live the great life you deserve. We all forget at times and we all bring ourselves back to knowing the truth about who we are and what we can do. We’re most definitely all in this together kiddo. 🙂

  2. Dear Elle,

    Thank you for sharing this, and my heart goes out to you about your brother. I think the points you made here are so important – ‘let it go’ for example. With this, so many people hang on to imagined slights and grievances, when in the deep scheme of things, they’re so immaterial. Love is all that matters – for us to love others and to encourage (and not cling to) love in our lives.

    I will remember to go out and be love today. xx

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Ellen and thank you for your kind words. You’ve made me day with your thought ‘I will remember to go out and be love today’ – what an amazing day you’ll have. 🙂

  3. Powerful, poignant, purposeful. Going through some rough times and the reminder of being happy NOW (not when things “work out”) helped a lot! Thanks.

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Therese, I’ve noticed for myself I need reminding on a daily basis of how wonderful life truly is, and how beautiful are the people in my world. Thank you for being one of them. 🙂

  4. Thanks for a great post Elle and the reminder of how precious life is, I know that one. Wishing you love and hugs for you and your family. Have a safe trip xx love Suzie

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Suzie – thank you dear friend. I know you know of what I speak and you bring so much sparkle and joy to the world…you are my role model for vibrant living. 🙂

      • Wow you made my evening Elle, can i use this on my blog: you bring so much sparkle and joy to the world…you are my role model for vibrant living.? thanks big hugs

        • ElleSommer

          Hello Suzie – please do use this on your blog…every word is truth. 🙂

    • ElleSommer

      Thanks Mark. You know how much I appreciate you both. 🙂

  5. Joseph Appaloosa

    Another excellent article from the Heart, Elle !
    Sharing how you nudged yourself to make that trip to London shows such honest and open insight into our collective human frailty . . .
    don’t wait to be happy, don’t wait to reach out to your Loved ones, don’t wait to capture the power of change and realize your dream. . .
    You have once again reminded us to practice “Love” in everything we do.
    Thank you and Write ON, Elle !

    • ElleSommer

      Thanks for your kindness Joseph. You’re so right, as usual. We do live with our human frailties and sometimes it’s that one step forward and two steps backwards, but we keep on keeping on and suddenly we find ourselves in a new state of being with new realities. Whatever’s happening in life if we put love into everything, things somehow turn out so much better than they might have. 🙂

  6. Elle,
    Thank you for the wake up reminders.
    When we are faced with losing someone, it is an incredible wake up call.
    And I like the way that you put “don’t diminish your blessings by comparing them with the blessings of others…”
    It’s easy to fall into the comparison trap so that we completely lose sight of our blessings.

    I hope your trip with your brother is heartfelt. Enjoy your time together.

    • ElleSommer

      Thanks for stopping by Jessica. I appreciate it and thank you for your kind words. 🙂

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Geraldo…I absolutely 100% agree with you. And, if you’re willing to share, I’d love to know what you’re doing to have your BIG dream come true. Everyone in our community benefits as we share how our life is working…or not…and the ideas we have to live more abundantly. 🙂

  7. Hi, as always, a very inspiring post from you. Don’t wait for happiness, let’s all do what we have to do to be happy. Love without fear and always live with love in our hearts. Thanks so much for sharing a beautiful article.

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Sherill…I’m so glad you’re enjoying the posts. I know it isn’t always easy to live without fear and stay in love, life, like nature, insists we have a little rain on us…but as you say so well, let’s do all that we have to do to feel happy. 🙂

  8. Hi, I always read your post, and with this, I love the part about spiritually speaking. I’ve shared it with my face book friends and they all loved it. Thanks so much for a very encouraging and motivating post.Great Read.

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Sherill…glad you like the spiritually speaking element that I’ve added to my articles. It’s such an important component in our lives and really doesn’t get as much attention as it deserves imho. Thank you for sharing with your friends…we’re all in this life together and with mutual support and kindness we can work miracles. 🙂

  9. Hello elle. Thank you for sharing your knowledge about how to stay positive when life gets tough. I really enjoy reading here and had fun as well. Thank you again elle.


    • ElleSommer

      Hello Yogi, welcome to the community, it’s lovely to have you here. 🙂

  10. So sad to hear of your brother\’s illness. Your article is very inspiring. It\’s very true that you shouldn\’t expect others to think the same way as you. It can be frustrating if you can see someone who can obviously do so much more for themselves, but won\’t listen to your views then don\’t feel unhappy. By detaching yourself you\’ll also stop any negative energy.

    • ElleSommer

      Not the easiest thing in the world is it Kathy. Especially when it all seems so clear in our consciousness. I’ve learned over the years to accept that people can only see what their consciousness allows them to, so it’s been a bit easier to detach to any outcome. I like the way you put it, about stopping the negative energy (mostly created by us being too attached of course.) 🙂

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