WorthlessnessI want to let you in on a little secret.

You can’t criticize yourself into a new, bigger, better version of who you currently are.

Sounds obvious doesn’t it?

Yet I bet you’ve done it to yourself.  Allowed that loud, rude voice to tell you that you’re not good enough.  

And sometimes the pressure from our family or society is enough for us to feel we don’t measure up. Enough for those feelings of worthlessness to become overwhelming.  Enough to send those negative voices into high gear. As if telling ourselves we’re worthless will somehow grow us into someone more awesome and put together.

Even when we know it won’t.    It Can’t.

So what can we do?

Here’s 4 genius ways to stop those feelings of worthlessness dead in their tracks.

1. Stop feeding the beast

When those feelings of worthlessness and the self-defeating mindset that goes along with them won’t go away, it’s time to stop feeding the beast. 

You are the one in control. Your mind should be one hundred percent the way you want it, yet how many moments of anxiety, irritation, or fear do you experience in a twenty four hour period?

When you find yourself focused on negative thoughts, it’s not because there’s anything wrong with you, your work, or those around you.  Essentially it’s because your mind isn’t taking instructions from you.

Truth be told you wouldn’t deliberately choose to feel miserable, would you?

So if feelings of worthlessness creep up on you, remind yourself, you can only think one thought at a time, and if you take out the negative and exchange it for a thought that is the exact opposite you’ve stopped feeding the beast.

Sometimes you just have to move on, stop worrying about it, stop focusing on it because otherwise, eventually you will manifest it.

[socialpug_tweet tweet=”The more love you give yourself the more love life gives back.” display_tweet=”The more love you give yourself the more love life gives back.”]

2. Turn those feelings of worthlessness into something ridiculous

Turn every negative thought into something so ridiculous that it’s laughable.

Imagine that you’re a teacher…or a sales person…it doesn’t really matter.

But for now let’s focus on you being a teacher.  And your classes aren’t going well.  It’s tough. And you think to yourself, “I’m just not cut out for this.”

But you catch yourself and say, “That’s just a negative thought.”

And using the ridiculous technique you might say.

“It’s true, everyone was right about me, I should have chosen a different career, and I wouldn’t be surprised if the next class I take the kids pour buckets of water all over my head.

And they’ll probably throw things at me and I’m going to be wet and bruised, and then they’ll all jump up on their desks and unfurl a giant banner that says, “Worst teacher ever.”

And then a giant clown will walk through the door and bop me on the nose.”

It all becomes so ridiculous that you have to laugh. And laughing at any negative thoughts rob them of their power.

3. Make misery or magic

Your mind is either a misery manufacturing machine or a magical manufacturing machine, depending on how you look at life.

When others look at life through the prism of happiness it’s not because they’re doing anything differently from you, they simply have a different perspective on what they do.

And life will always seem more magic than misery when you’re not focused on what could go wrong.

The quality of their life is better because of how they look at it.  They’re sense of worth is greater because of how they look at it.

When you do the right things, the right things will happen for you.

4. Cook up some soul soup

Don’t judge yourself by what’s happened in the past. It’s simply part of the growth process.  And if those feelings of worthlessness strike, finding that prism of happiness is really more chemistry than magic.

We can never tell where we’ll be at the end of our journey, but we know where we are today and from this place we can stop poisoning ourselves from within.  It’s that inner poisoning that fuels feelings of worthlessness.

If you’re poisoning yourself from within, how can you live a life of happiness and wellbeing?

The source of creation is housed in the chemical soup that is you. Everyone of us has been given the same ingredients, but each one of us mixes our soup in different ways.

Be someone who knows that cooking up a great soup for the soul means making sure the chemistry of happiness and joy are within.  A chemistry that won’t be disturbed by what people say, and not determined by anything that happens to you.

Once your soul soup becomes emotionally and spiritually right for you, you’ll be able to find the happiness and peace you seek.

Final thoughts

The real tragedy of life isn’t that you sometimes have felt worthless; it lies in not knowing how to change the only thing you have control over.  You.

Live well.  Smile about life. Follow your heart. Look for something good and happy every day.  Tune out the negative thoughts. Work on it. Devote yourself to a dream so big you have no idea how you’ll make it come true.

Remember you are priceless.  This is your one precious life and you have all the elements for happiness that you will ever need. Go and make a spectacular soul soup and ditch those feelings of worthlessness once and for all.

Encourage one another.

Love Elle



Elle Sommer is the author of 4 books and a workbook. Her latest publications are a series called The Power of Consciousness, and you will find all three books in this trilogy now available on Kindle. She shares quotes, inspiration and positive vibes on Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest. And her greatest desire is to encourage and inspire others to create not just a good life, but a phenomenal life.


  1. Great ideas, Elle. It sounds so easy to change the way we think and our perspective, but it’s not. I am working with someone right now, and I try to get them to work with their thoughts daily. And they can with me, but not without me leading them. Sometimes, it is SOO frustrating. It is simple, yes! But easy to do, no! But SOOO worth it and makes all the difference!

    • I think it’s pretty simple Debbie…but simple isn’t always easy as we know. In the end we are the only ones thinking our thoughts, no one else can do it for us, sadly…since I would probably let them if they could do a better job than me! lol. And even being aware of where our mind is leading us for some of the time during the day would make an incredible difference. I’m not sure that, for most of us, it’s a 100% thing, but I’m willing to be wrong. 🙂

  2. This sentence stopped me in a good way, Elle: “Truth be told you wouldn’t deliberately choose to feel miserable, would you?” If we could only remember this. You’re so right, it’s a matter of retraining our mind with the kinds of antidotes you suggest. We can do this!

    • Yes we can do this Sandra…too bad we weren’t told as kids that this was possible…what an awesome way to grow up…with the understanding that the mind was our tool, not the other way around. 🙂

  3. Elle, I wish you would write a book of your wonderful sayings, they always speak so clearly and loudly to me. I’ve had to include ‘You can’t criticize yourself into a new, bigger, better version of who you currently are.’ at the front of my journal. Thank you xxx

    • Hi Laura…thanks for your kind words. I so appreciate the encouragement. I must say I’ve never thought of my sayings as book material…so thank you for expanding my consciousness around this. That’s a wonderful gift you’ve given me. 🙂

  4. so wonderful elle… soul soup example is really very impact full. And after reading this I will really try to best soul soup out of my own gifted ingredients

    Thank you soooooo much.

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