Living in an endless loop of negativity isn’t great, because thoughts repeated often enough become the reality, regardless of whether they’re true or not!

You know what I mean thoughts like:

“I’m too fat. I’m just not good enough.

I’ll never get promoted. I don’t have what it takes.

I’m never enough. I can never do anything well.

My family is right; I’m just good for nothing.

No one likes me. Why do I bother?

No one cares about me. I’m just a loner.”

Does this describe the kind of thoughts you have? 

Do you find yourself constantly depressed and dejected from feelings of not being enough or able to do the things you want to do? 

Do you make plans and find it hard to make them happen? 

Do you beat yourself up with cruel self-talk at any slight mistake you make? 

And worst of all, have you found yourself stuck in this endless loop of negativity with no chance of escape? 

Well, I have good news for you; YOU ARE NOT ALONE! 

Before we begin, here’s a great reminder to add to your archive. And that’s: ‘Thoughts becomes things.’

Whatever you allow to influence your subconscious mind, influences your life.

I was once stuck in an endless loop of negativity of low self-confidence because I saw myself as fat or because everyone around me said so. 

I didn’t like to be fat, nor did I love that I couldn’t be confident in my physical appearance.

What did I do? 

When the thought or the words from others came;

I’m fat! 

I showed myself some love and appreciation by also thinking;

But I’m beautiful; there’s no other ‘me’ elsewhere, I’m unique and specially made. 


This made all the difference to the energy I was occupying.

When everyone kept saying to me, “You’re fat” I gave myself a comment I much preferred to hear, and that put me in a better mood which made me more productive in my workouts and exercises on my path to greater fitness and wellbeing. 

We all have these little voices inside our heads, feeding us with either positive or negative comments. 

The choice of whether the voice speaking to you is positive or not is really not in your control, right? 


But! you are responsible for that which you allow to stay, you are responsible for the thoughts you decide to feed, nurture, and allow to take root in your mind. 

These thoughts become your default setting, your subconscious self, and If not taken care of, they’ll end up becoming a whole part of your being. 

Source your negativity

Most of the negative thoughts we have about ourselves spring from the fact that we want to gain approval from others. 

When whatever you do never seems enough in your own eyes, unless someone else approves of it, you live your life dependent on the rules and dictation of others. 

This is a wrong approach to living your life because no one can make you feel good about yourself, you have to take responsibility for your happiness in life, and that includes your approval of whatever you do as being the best thing you can do right now. 

Most often we try to satisfy or please others in whatever we do, trying to gain their recognition or have a sense of belonging to their tribe but it usually does not turn out to be how we want it. 

It’s far too easy for others to take advantage of our weakness in not being able to stand independently and treat us as inferior beings while we are simply doing our best, which often ends up never being enough. 

Feeding the endless loop of negativity

Some don’t depend on anyone for approval or appreciation, but they still find themselves feeding negativity. 


I’ll tell you. 

If you find yourself feeling bad for failing to meet your deadlines or your desired expectations, which is typical for every hardworking individual, you might end up feeling anxious, angry, scared and consumed with negativity. 

If this happens, again and again, you find yourself trapped in this loop, unable to break free.


What do you do? 

How do you get out? 

This is too much; you feel tired and exhausted… 

What can you do to break free from this relentless negativity loop? 

All you need is love

Maybe you have all the love you want from family, friends, your spouse, and your children, or perhaps you don’t! 

Well, that actually does not matter right now because we want to deal with SELF! 

How is your self-love? 

You can’t see other people loving you if you don’t love yourself. 

You can’t love other people either if you don’t love yourself. 

You can’t give what you do not have; you can’t have what you do not choose. 

What is self love?

Self-love doesn’t necessarily mean you are selfish or self-centered; it only means giving high regard to your own happiness in life. 

When things don’t go according to the plan you had in mind, which is bound to happen, do not blame yourself, show yourself, love. 

Instead of focusing on what you don’t get, concentrate instead on what you do have.

It’s okay to feel the sting of disappointment, whether it is from friends and family around you or it is from you, disappointments will always come your way, but you don’t have to live there or dwell on them. 

Accept and acknowledge your disappointment and failures, then forgive yourself for every wrong turn you took, every wrong decision you made, forgive yourself, and then you can heal and spring back to your feet, ready to fight for what you deserve. 

Finally escaping that endless loop of negativity

Will this work?

Yes, it will.

Research has shown that negativity causes one to be mentally fatigue which leads to less productivity. 

Although some people believe that pointing out their negative side propels them to be creative, what you should understand is that you can achieve nothing if you remain in your negative state of vibration. 

The negative comments or criticism might point you in the direction of things you need to work on, but most people find themselves stuck there, unable to rise from it or even find a solution. 

Your best escape plan is to counter your negativity with love and gratitude, shift your focus from all you think you don’t have and focus instead on all you’ve achieved. 

Your mind might reject the love you’re showing yourself at first because you have fed yourself negativity for so long, but if you keep at it, feeding yourself with love and positive thoughts, you will gradually find your freedom. 

You’ve been hard enough on yourself. Giving yourself the words and love you have been longing to hear is a simple and effective way for dealing with an endless loop of negativity.

Try to tell yourself;

I’m beautiful 

I’m just enough

I’m loved

I’m uniquely skilled

I deserve everything good

I deserve the best

I deserve to live my dream life, and I definitely will… 

So do not give up, do not let the negativity around you and within you get in the way of achieving your dreams. 

You are the best person for that position, go for it! You are more than enough! 

When next negativity comes knocking on the door of your heart, accept it, acknowledge it, and then show yourself some love. 

All you need is love! 

Show yourself some love,

You are important too!


Cephas Tope is the author of The Road Map to Your Extraordinary Life. He writes at highachievers.me, where he shares self improvement and business tips. you can join his free newsletter to learn how to make unshakeable progress and how to create extraordinary super life.

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