The people we are in relationship with are always a mirror, reflecting our own beliefs, and simultaneously we are mirrors, reflecting their beliefs. Back in the day I had more weird, awful, miserable relationship experiences and dodgy boyfriends than you’ve probably had hot dinners. I’ve been involved with abusers, liars and demanders, controllers…sometimes one and the same. I’ve been cheated and mistreated and that’s not counting dealing with jealousy, insecurities and all the other foibles that come with those relationships from hell. I just used to think I was unlucky in love! Every now and then ‘luck’ smiled on me and somebody wonderful showed up. But mostly I kissed my fair share of frogs and they never turned into a handsome prince. Why is that? Eventually I began to believe it was all my fault. Seems like we have a built in fault finding system. Things go wrong again and again and so we’re…
“Can you just stop it? You are so stupid, keep your mouth shut!” I was walking on the street one day when I overheard a quarrel between a husband and wife. I am certain that you have spoken many unkind words in your life before. Some of them you may still regret till today. Have you actually taken a step back to consider what the useless results of criticism are? In our fit of anger, we criticise, we put down and we condemn. Small criticisms have huge impacts, sometimes even causing an entire relationship to fall apart. But, what if we thought about it the opposite way? What if we instead start to affirm, rather than put down? You may find affirming others difficult, and yes I too feel that way. However, just imagine what a small bit of encouragement could do! It has so many more benefits than you…
We all understand that we are people with differences, based on the fact that we have different religious values, morals, societal values, different DNAs, thinking patterns, blood types, blood groups and so on. So how can we not expect to encounter difficult personalities in our day to day life? Be it at work, school, in our family or a close relationship. The fact is, wherever you go, there will always be someone you meet, who will surprise you with how difficult they can be. (: So understanding and accepting this can save you from a world of hurt or trouble. Knowing that there are several types of difficult people and identifying their differences and learning how to deal with them effectively, will help you keep your cool when you find yourself in difficult relationships. Check out these six different personalities and how you can deal with them effectively. As you…
“Сodependency fits everyone to greater or lesser degrees,” that’s exactly what Ruth Morehouse, Ph.D. and co-director of world-known Marriage & Family Health Center says. (And frankly, I do agree with her, relying on my complicated toxic relationship experiences). Thus, I also admit the fact that the risk of finding myself in unfulfilling, dishonest relationships that feature emotional fusion is very high. Moreover, such unhealthy codependency can pervade any kind of interactions from work to my family connections. Still, codependency is not recognized as a distinct personality disorder by any version of the DSM, so the co-dependent behavior is not something I should be afraid of. It’s something I should just be able to identify, treat, and overcome in order to live a fuller and happier life. But this knowledge isn’t something I was born with. I’ve learned it from my toxic 3-year-long relationships, and I wanna share my experience with…
Andy Andrews, an American Author said: “In desperate times, much more than anything else, we all need perspective. For perspective brings calm. Calm leads to clear thinking. Clear Thinking yields new ideas. And ideas produce the bloom of an answer. Keep your head and heart clear; perspective can just as easily be lost as it can be found”. Have you clouded your mind with negative thoughts, fear, and doubt until you’ve lost all perspective? Are you at the point of throwing in the towel in frustration and disappointment, all because of the chaos of lack clarity? If this might be you, hopefully I have a solution for you. So read, enjoy, and then remember to act on it! That’s the point where so many people stop. And that’s why so many are on a path to nowhere. A clear mind will support you in achieving your dreams and we all…