My friend called me the other day, absolutely fuming about something that had happened at Tesco. She’d popped in for a quick shop and was wearing this gorgeous leopard print dress (her latest Temu find) that she’d been excited to try out. She described how she was quietly minding her own business, debating between brands of pasta (the important decisions in life), when she overheard two women nearby. One nudged the other and said, “Bit much for grocery shopping, don’t you think?” followed by some giggles. My friend told me she immediately felt like leaving the shop and started second-guessing everything. Should she have worn something more neutral? Was she being too much? Did everyone think she was trying too hard just to buy groceries? “I spent the rest of my shop feeling self-conscious,” she said. “Can you believe I let two strangers I’ll never see again ruin my mood…
Updated Version When you feel rejected, it can be a painful experience. In fact it’s considered one of the most painful experiences we encounter as human beings. Research shows that experiencing social rejection fires up the same neural pathways as physical pain. Who knew? Well probably those of us who are extremely sensitive to rejection. And for those who are extremely sensitive in can also feel like a signal that they’re not good enough. We don’t talk about the fear of being rejected very much because it can be as painful an experience as feeling abandoned. And very likely comes from the same place, usually connected to the initial relationships we had with our caretakers. I know this was true for me…by the time I was five I had acquired the feeling of being abandoned. Maybe because for the first four years of my life my father was away in…
I’ve lived a boring and oftentimes lonely life because I thought I sucked at developing good relationships with others. Few years back, while still at college, I could say I knew a total of six to ten people who I kind of had a close friendship with, not that I didn’t have colleagues. Still, we just had a farther relationship, and that was primarily because I thought I sucked at starting a conversation that could lead to a good relationship with someone. I always thought; if you come talking to me first and we find common ground, then I could take it up from there. But I noticed no one came around, just a few who were bold enough or who got to see a side of me they liked that seemed interesting and even then, for the most part I didn’t let down my walls of insecurity for fear…
Jealousy isn’t simply a feeling, it’s a mean, intense, unhealthy feeling. And even though none of us has ever lived without feeling it to some degree or another, about one thing or another, that doesn’t mean we should let it take over. Whatever the form of jealousy, be it of the success of others, the things other people have or jealousy in a relationship, it’s a toxic emotion. Jealousy has a way of making us feel insecure. It creates emotions that if not carefully dealt with, can make us become uncomfortable with our very environment. This eventually leads us to living each day not only in the tight grip of insecurities but wrapped in the arms of unhappiness. Jealousy has cost so many people their relationships and perhaps created loss of respect of those close to them. Look. The truth is, If you’re getting jealous over something, you will start…
“Can you just stop it? You are so stupid, keep your mouth shut!” I was walking on the street one day when I overheard a quarrel between a husband and wife. I am certain that you have spoken many unkind words in your life before. Some of them you may still regret till today. Have you actually taken a step back to consider what the useless results of criticism are? In our fit of anger, we criticise, we put down and we condemn. Small criticisms have huge impacts, sometimes even causing an entire relationship to fall apart. But, what if we thought about it the opposite way? What if we instead start to affirm, rather than put down? You may find affirming others difficult, and yes I too feel that way. However, just imagine what a small bit of encouragement could do! It has so many more benefits than you…




