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How often have you had the kind of day when you feel the whole world is yours for the taking?
You can see the good in everything and it’s easy to grasp each opportunity and possibility that comes your way.
Life is awesome.
And then, before you know it, everything falls apart.
What the heck just happened?
Those old toxic fears began creeping back. Doubts and fears take a firm grip of your mind, holding you hostage as they maliciously whisper all the reasons you can never be more successful, never accomplish your heart’s desire, never be really, truly happy.
At least not for long.
Once these beliefs gain a foothold they’re hard to eliminate. They’re like toxic mold that spreads into every nook and cranny. Don’t allow them in. Don’t be a prisoner in your own mind.
Life tends not be a smooth, unbroken path and we can’t help ourselves experience a more peaceful journey if we keep living an unconscious life.
Decide that from now on, you no longer have room in your mind for these common toxic beliefs that will jeopardize your success and happiness in a heartbeat. They’re unwanted baggage on your life’s journey and it’s time to give them the old heave ho.
1. Why does this keep happening to me
If you want something to no longer show up in your life, don’t hate that it’s there. Everything or everyone that you hate become engraved on your mind and heart and continues to show up to remind you that it’s still hanging around.
Stop putting your attention on all the things you dislike about your life. The old saying what you resist persists still holds true today and the secret to avoid resisting or hating what you don’t want in your life is being willing to accept that it’s there and then accepting that it doesn’t have to stop you.
It isn’t fatal to your successful happy life, unless you allow it to be.
2. It isn’t my fault
It’s easy to point a finger and say it’s their fault. They did it. But better to be honest, better to be honourable in all your dealings. Perfection isn’t real and you’re going to make mistakes, and maybe really screw things up. It’s ok. Everyone does it.
Be willing to be responsible and to put things right when and where you can. No-one thinks less of you because you messed up. But they will think less of you if you try to place the blame on others. And worse, you’ll think less of yourself.
Your willingness to own and take responsibility for the choices you make determines your courage and prevents the squandering of relationships and opportunities.
Be brave. Live in integrity; that’s how you live in harmony with your true self.
3. It’s always the same old, same old
Stop letting past dramas, past labels, past judgements, past betrayals, and past mistakes, dominate your future.
Your past has nothing new to tell you. Nothing new to show you. Don’t complain about past injustices, hurts or lack. Look on them as you would a wake of a boat. A vanishing trail that shows you who you were and where you’ve been.
Alan Watts said it best, when he said you can’t steer the boat towards your future by staring at the wake. The wake just shows you where you’ve been, not where you’re headed.
Although it’s easy to let your past become your future, you don’t have to allow this. The past only has the power you grant it and you are in control. Step up and don’t let the past, unless it’s absolutely fabulous of course, seep into your future.
4. I’m powerless
Rid yourself of the belief that you’re powerless.
Your dreams and desires might still be outside your reality, but have you created a mental vision? Do you have an eager desire you want to experience?
Visioning is seeing the invisible before it becomes visible to others. It’s a directive to your inner being to become something greater.
Whilst no amount of wishing will make your dreams come true, any amount of imagination helps them to appear in your world. Don’t ever buy into the idea that you have no power to refine your life and change the world around you.
Commit to your vision, and unimaginable, unexpected events will occur to support you on your journey.
In your deeper self lies the strength, dedication and bravery to truly begin to bring your dreams to life.
You are here on this earth to do something wonderful, and to make that happen you need a vision of something bigger, greater than who you are and where you are right now.
Tap into your destiny. [tweetthis]The only obstacles to your possibilities are your beliefs and limited imagination.[/tweetthis]
5. I’m not sure I can
Once you’ve decided on a new course. Go for it. Be all in.
The winds of negativity will blow around you, obstacles might stand in your way. Don’t worry about them, don’t worry what other people might say, just keep your mind on your course, on your destination.
Those winds might blow hard and strong, but if you know where you’re going, you can use them to push you towards the dreams and desires that you’ve already decided belong to you.
Be willing to be seen. Be daring enough to show up, be brave enough to push through the darkness of doubt and fear and connect with the infinite light of your inner power.
The first step towards living beyond beliefs that jeopardize your happiness, success and wellbeing is desire. You must truly want to eliminate them, want to be a creative, constructive, positive expression of life.
And the best news of all is that you already possess everything you need to accomplish this. You have what nothing else in nature has…imagination. The instrument through which, if used consistently towards the fulfilling of desires, you create a new world.
Now, I’d love to hear from you. What are some beliefs that you know are jeopardising your success and happiness? Please share as much detail as possible in your comment as many amazing souls come here each week for encouragement and insight. Your share may just be what someone else needs to have a breakthrough.
As always, thank you so much for continuing to make this such a bright heartfelt space. And if you know of anyone who needs some encouragement, please share this post with them. I appreciate you.
Encourage one another.
24 thoughts on “5 Toxic Beliefs That Jeopardise Your Success and Happiness”
Hi elle; yes the gremlins can show up at any time and they are hard to get rid of if you let them in. i am generally very positive and forward thinking but i recently had this problem. I had been doing interviews on radio shows and blog and built up to being on the january jones no whining zone. she is the author and coach not the actress of the same name. I was also featured in a very candid and inspiring profile on new york magazine. I thought I would see a big increase in website traffic and contacts about coaching and or speaking. the magazine article only received three comments. Only one person emailed me directly. I was starting to wonder if anyone cared. I even asked myself if i had done a poor job of promoting it. but i did everything i could. i gave open authentic answers to all her questions and it was a great article. so i don’t know why it hasn’t lead to more results but it wasn’t anything i did or failed to do. however, I did do some introspection. and I have started challenging people to take action. I’m continuing to record videos and write posts. I know that the big break through is coming i just haven’t got there yet. would love any thoughts. thanks so much max
Hello Max…you already know how I impressed I am with your success, so I won’t repeat that. I hear that you were disappointed with your recent projects, and I’d just remind you to have unshakeable beliefs. Everything appears in it’s appointed hour and even in our disappointments there’s something wonderful to be found. I know you know that.
Whatever you’re seeking is definitely seeking you, it just doesn’t always show up in the ways we might think. (I speak from lots of experience here!)
If you’re absolutely convinced of your happy outcome, whatever that might be for you, and don’t allow anything to distract you from it, it must appear. Keep on imagining the best you can. And imho you are amazing and have come a long way since we became friends.
I’d love to hear what others in our wonderful community have to say to you, I’m sure it would be inspirational. 🙂
I am 67 years old and a counselor of Seniors. All you have written about is so familiar and yet my years of struggling with those issues seem so long ago. I think I had to go through those stages of toxic thinking to get to know the wisdom of age.
Love what you say Tillie – it does seem as though there are universal challenges that we all experience. I’ve certainly found these beliefs to be very common, having heard them a lot during coaching sessions of old. 🙂
Spot on, Elle !
It is amazing, how without even being aware, we allow bits of our old “less-than”programming to continue to run and hinder our progress on so many levels. Thank you for the constant reminders in your column that as we expand our awareness we expand our lives into greater happiness, health and abundance of all kinds.
And for Maxwell – Stay in your wonderful end . . . pay no attention to the machinations going on about you . . . KNOW and FEEL it to be so and you will experience it !
Write on, Elle !
Hello Joseph, reminders are good aren’t they? I know I’m always grateful for them in my life. And I really like your advice to Max…it’s wonderful that we are here in this amazing community to support one another whenever and wherever we can. Thank you for that Joseph. 🙂
Hi Elle – great post – I love your way of putting it – ‘same old, same old. ‘ I’ll think of that phrase every time a ghost from the past tries to pull me back into old ways of thinking and acting. Thanks for the inspiration.
Hello Mark – oooh I like that phrase, ghost from the past…that’s just what they are really, ephemeral, with no power in our world without our say say. Glad the article resonated with you and it’s lovely to hear from you. 🙂
Your words touched my heart and I recognised that what I call the FUD factor, Trust and belief that we can are paramount. Thanks I know I Can and now to do and be xxoo
Tell me more about the FUD factor Suzie! And you, my friend, my creative, brilliant friend already shine so brightly, it will be amazing to see where you go from here. You’re already a star. 🙂
For me it’s the doubt or rather the sad belief that I am not made for great things…Mediocre, yes, but nothing extraordinary…And that prevents me from really going for the kill…I know what I want, what I would have loved to achieve but somewhere a voice tells me that I have reached where I could and I won’t get anything more…Makes sense?
I know these thoughts limit me..At times I try to fight them but often I surrender to that negative voice and make peace with what I have…
Hello Nabanita, the thing of it is that you aren’t designed to be anything other than the greatest expression of you possible. Whatever that is. It is uniquely you.
We are always capable of rising in consciousness, which means, we’re always able to grow…don’t listen to any voices or any people that tell you otherwise dear one. Don’t fight inner doubts, practice ignoring them and soon you’ll no longer hear them so often. If you fight them, you feed them and give them power.
Allow your resistance to move you forward, to nourish, not discourage. Decide on your dreams and keep on breathing life into them and they can, they must be born in your world. 🙂
I love this post. It is spot on with the limiting beliefs. I definitely fall into the “why is this always happening to me” trap. But instead it is best to try to embrace the process and the lesson that comes from it instead of complaining and being pessimistic. Thank you so much for this.
Hello Kam, how lovely to see you here. And yes, ‘why is this happening to me’ is a pretty common reaction to events…as though there’s some outside power trying to make things difficult for us, when really all we need is a change in perspective, just as you say. That’s a great awareness dear one. 🙂
I had finally released an ex back from 5 years ago and I felt light and happy for a day. I was that happy young woman again. I was attracting sunshine, men who were commenting on my “beauty”, women engaging in laughter with me and even became creative enough to come up with an exciting business idea and then as a result of having too much caffeine, I spent most of the night thinking about my ex boyfriend and the injustices from him and his family. I began visualizing telling my ex what a coward for failing to protect me from his friends and leaving with no closure but instead threats of hurting me. Today I was back to the negativity.
I will go back to the happy girl again tonight after some sleep and I will focus on being robotic in my emotions towards him and not feeding those self pity victim peptides.
Hi Eros, I’m sorry to hear you left the light happy woman behind, even for a day and a night. And good for you for your level of awareness.
It isn’t always easy to direct our thoughts towards the things that feel good and are positive in our life. But you are an amazing, wonderful being with the power to forgive and let go, not because anything or anyone deserves it,but because you deserve peace. The greatest ability you have to support you is the power to choose one thought over another. I encourage you to choose the best and greatest thoughts all day today and when you fall asleep tonight. And keep on doing that and watch your world become new.
I’m imagining good and happy things for you. Blessings. 🙂
Thank you for having positive thoughts for me. I’m not sure how, but they worked. My reality is much more peaceful and exciting, in a good way. Thank you!
Hello Eros, I’m so happy things are much more peaceful for you and a dash of excitement is always a good feeling to have. I’m glad to have shared my energy with you and I’m even more glad you were able to receive it. Great job you, as some say across the pond! 🙂
Great reminders here Elle! I have fallen into the powerless mindset in the past. Empowerment feels so much healthy. Another one that has gotten in my way is the idea that if I’m not good at something, I won’t put out the effort. That limiting belief can keep a person stuck, yet so often you can find that either you are better than you thought or you can surround yourself with people who can help when needed.
Hi Cathy…what you say is so true. It comes down to that concept that if you don’t try, you’ll never know what you’re capable of. The sad thing is that so many are much more capable than they give themselves credit for.
I think we’ve all fallen for that one at some point in our lives.
I love what you say about surrounding ourselves with people who can help when needed. Thank you for sharing your wisdom. 🙂
Look at these social shares. That’s incredible. A friend of mine blogs about your topic, and I will be recommending she follow you.
Hello Janice, it’s lovely to ‘see’ you here and I appreciate your recommendation, I’m sure your friend will have some wise insights to share with us. It’s amazing what we can accomplish when we get together. 🙂
Hi Elle. First time here. I enjoyed this post very much. You write and think in a beautifully clear way. I’ve been telling myself the “why does this keep happening to me?” story today. Instead of dissecting it or trying to get away from it, starting now I”m withdrawing my attention from it. Thank you.
Hi Narelle, welcome to the Live Purposefully Now community, it’s lovely to have you and to hear where you are on your journey. Withdrawing your attention from what doesn’t serve you is a great way to walk a new path. I’d love to hear more as you practice this, 🙂