Too often you don’t do the things that allow you to live the way you want.

It’s easy to be torn between the desire to follow your dreams or stay on the safest path. 

But here’s the thing. The safest path isn’t always the best path.

We want to keep our attention on what matters, to listen to the call of our hearts and let the rest go, and we intend to do it, but it isn’t always easy.

With some small goals and taking little steps towards doing more than just dreaming of living the way you want, you can purposefully and deliberately move in the direction of a rich and meaningful life.

1. Don’t be afraid of mystery

Letting yourself be pulled by the call of your heart, the important things in life don’t always feel like the safest path. Uneasiness and doubt often shroud the way. And fear has a loud voice.

Can I do it?      Am I good enough?      How will it work out?      What if I fail?

You can’t see the path ahead because you haven’t begun the journey. But you can see what’s right in front of you now.

Take little steps; you can make the whole journey by just looking at what’s in front of you in this moment. And however hard it seems right now, the more you persist the greater your chance of success.

2. Let go of all or nothing thinking

Right or wrong. Good or bad. Strong or weak.  Black and white thinking will always hold you back.

Before too long you become a slave to the ‘have tos’ and ‘shoulds’ and you miss out on the ‘maybe’s’ and ‘what if’s’. And that’s the place where opportunities, possibilities and helpful people are.

All or nothing exists only in your mind. It robs you of your joy. It stops you from seeing that you’re not either/or. You’re not either strong or weak, good or bad and relationships aren’t great or awful.

Stop choosing to do nothing just because you can only do a little.  Do what you can.  It’s often those little acts that make a world of difference in living the life you want.

 3. Stop negative labelling

Just because you procrastinated once, well okay, maybe two or three times, don’t say to yourself I’m a procrastinator. If you messed something up don’t say I’m stupid. If someone left you, don’t say I’m unlovable.

Don’t be so willing to put yourself in a box. You’re not a one dimensional being. You’re greater than that.

How would your life benefit by letting go of past unsupportive labels?

Tell yourself I am creative, I am amazing, I am successful, I am joyful, I am loved. Sometimes being willing to change the labels you’ve given yourself is all you need to open yourself to the next phase of your journey, to see yourself and your world with new eyes.

4. Who cares what others think

It doesn’t much matter what others think, unless you allow it to. What does matter is what you think of yourself. The way you speak to yourself and think about yourself. Make it positive. Make it good.

The unhappiest people on the planet are those who care far too much about what other people think.

Never hand your life over to ‘others’.  They don’t have to live with the consequences.  The greatest miracle of your life will be that you were in charge of how to live it.

5. Make the world more beautiful 

Be generous with your compliments today.

Shine a light for someone who’s stumbling in the dark.

Shower encouragement on everyone you come across. And spend time with those who encourage and motivate you.

Don’t be one who happily shares all that’s wrong in the world but rarely speaks words of positivity and praise. Make the world a more beautiful place because you’re in it.

6. You have all you need to live the way you want

If you want to live the life you truly want you have to take control.

Clear the clutter of negativity, reduce the time wasting activities that bring you no contentment. Refuse to limit or repress your ideas, they are the seeds of your future.

If you expect it to be an easy ride you’ll set yourself up for constant disappointment. There are days when everything seems hard but remember that even during the roughest patches the rewards for your dedication and persistence are great.

Free yourself from the fears and worries that keep you stuck.

Do your best, give your all.

Dream.    Plan.    Do.

And you’ll discover you’ve been given all the gifts and talents you need to create and live the life you truly want.

7. Don’t expect someday to arrive

 life on hold

Don’t put your life on hold because someday your ship will come in, someday when you have more time, someday when the money arrives. This is a surefire path to a life of regrets.

Your hopes for a better life rest in your willingness to be open to all the opportunities in the now moment. Now is the only creative moment there is. Life goes by faster than you think, make now your defining moment and begin to move towards your dreams.

You’ll never live the life you want by continually arguing for your limitations.

The world is offering up to you in this moment all the miracles and opportunities you could wish for. How hard is it for you to say yes?

Spiritually speaking

Imagine standing in front of the ocean holding a container. Is it an old cracked cup, a vase, a bucket, or have you plugged in a pipe that gushes water continuously towards you? Whatever it is you’re not going to be able to run that ocean dry.

The ocean of life won’t be run dry either.  And your consciousness is the container. Open it up to accept and allow as much abundance of  joy, wisdom, prosperity and love you can hold.

Determine to eliminate feelings of unworthiness or that you are undeserving of the abundance on offer. Poverty thinking never created a prosperous life.

Enlarge your container, develop your consciousness, allow your greatness to shine.

You deserve to have your dreams come true, you deserve to feel alive and vibrant, you deserve to live the life you want. All that’s needed is your active participation.

Encourage one another.

Love Elle


Elle Sommer is the author of 4 books and a workbook. Her latest publications are a series called The Power of Consciousness, and you will find all three books in this trilogy now available on Kindle. She shares quotes, inspiration and positive vibes on Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest. And her greatest desire is to encourage and inspire others to create not just a good life, but a phenomenal life.


  1. Elle, I loved how you summarized the key points in this: “We want to keep our attention on what matters, to listen to the call of our hearts and let the rest go, and we intend to do it, but it isn’t always easy.” Your first point really pulls me as “mystery” is a more interesting and less unnerving word than uncertainty. I like the idea of looking at life as an unfolding mystery. Thanks, Elle.

    • ElleSommer

      I like the idea of mystery too Sandra. There is a certain magical mysteriousness about how life unfolds and how we get to see our inner reality mirrored in the outer if only we can connect the dots! As always your comments encourage me and I thank you. 🙂

  2. Love the container example! I take all joy, love, prosperity, abundance, wisdom, etc! Thank you for always inspiring us to live a happy life. 🙂

    • ElleSommer

      Hi Edith, the container analogy is an oldie but goodie. I sometimes forget that what seems old hat to me, isn’t necessarily the truth for everyone…so it’s good to be reminded. I’m glad you’re filling your container with all the goodies life has on offer. 🙂

  3. Once again Elle, you’ve ht the nail on the head. Actually with one swipe of your magic pen you hit the head on many nails. And, once again the timing was perfect. I especially resonated with #6, “You have all you need to live the life you want.” This resonates with me because of all your previous posts on having an amazing life. You are a remarkable teacher of wisdom. Thank you for doing what you do. I know it how much your have helped me, but I can only imagine the thousands of others you have helped along the way.

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Brian. I’m grateful for your kind words. It’s inspiring to know that it is possible with a swipe of the pen to empower others. 🙂

  4. Lovely post Elle – people give themselves negative labels and hang onto them all their lives – everything is fluid – our yesterday is definitely not our tomorrow if we choose

    Thanks for the inspiration

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Mark, so true, everything is fluid, if we could only appreciate the facts are always changing perhaps we’d make life a little easier on ourselves. 🙂

  5. I love all these tips, Elle! Very empowering. I have been guilty of doing the opposite at some time or other through various circumstances, but the good thing is, I learned from my stupidity, most of the time. We never stop learning and life is such a great teacher. Thank you for such an inspiring post!

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Vidya – so true about never stopping learning…always assuming we want to use our experiences to do that and not just to confirm the less than supportive view we hold about ourselves. Sadly, I meet far too many people who do that. I’m so happy you enjoyed the post and I thank you for taking the time to say so, coming from you my friend, it’s very encouraging. 🙂

  6. Hi Elle

    I enjoyed this tip. Your message are so inspiring that I could read three or more posts in your blog and still want more.

    You are spot on and I agree with your points. Nothing much to say just more kudos to your writing.

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Ikechi, you make me smile with your encouragement. What a great motivator you are my friend. 🙂

  7. I love this post Elle. I love #7 the most because we all are guilty of waiting around waiting for one day when we will be happy. One day when we will get it together. One day when we have the money we need. Little do we realize that one day is now. Thanks for opening up mine eyes.

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Rose, nice to see you again. You’re right, we’ve all done #7 – heck sometimes I do it even today…I just catch myself quicker. 🙂

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Rose, nice to see you again. You’re so right about #7, I’m still guilty of that some days myself. It’s just quicker to catch than it used to be. I tried to leave a comment and contact you via your website, but there’s some problem with your captcha. You might like to check that out so we can all share with you how wonderful your posts are! 🙂

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Jessica, thanks for stopping by and I’m glad you enjoyed the article. 🙂 Hope to see you again next week. 🙂

  8. Hi Elle!

    Wow! I’m still at a loss for words right now. It feels like I’ve been hit right deep inside my inner self. Thank you so much for giving people that kind of effect. You’re so full of wisdom and inspiration. I have had many questions in my life before about the things I really wanted for my life but I only had them in my mind. I used to be afraid of trying and moving forward but I realized I won’t get anywhere if I don’t try. Thank you for emphasizing that. I have also been a negative person before. I used to look at myself as someone who’s undeserving of things but everything changed because of my faith in God. It’s true indeed that negative labeling of oneself can never help a person move on through life.

    Again, thank you for this wonderful post. 🙂

    • ElleSommer

      Hello Grace. I’m so happy you liked the post and I’d like to say a big thank you to you for taking the time to leave a comment and say so. 🙂

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