Summer rain

[success]Obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall don’t turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it. ~ Michael Jordan[/success]

My life is similar to yours, sometimes up, sometimes down; filled with great things and discouragement. Everyone experiences heartache and setbacks. Who hasn’t felt the sting of rejection or the sorrow of loss?

Today, if you’re drooping from the latest down in your life or if you haven’t yet had a dream come true, remember tomorrow will be a new day, a new start.

A new start means letting some things go, being empty of what was full. Don’t be afraid to release old patterns and replace them with new ideas. Being full of past dramas, old beliefs and concepts, past betrayals and setbacks keeps you from creating the life of your dreams today.

Let today be the day you stop making excuses as to why things aren’t working well in your life.

Here’s 4 things to stop doing so you can start to flourish.

Stop asking the wrong questions

You and you alone have the power to make life different, to make the changes that bring you the results you want.

Not everything turns out as planned. And all the thoughts and questions of why it didn’t happen and why it went wrong threaten to overwhelm you.

Don’t view this as a bad thing, because now you get to see all the subconscious reasons that block your progress. Use it as an opportunity to ask the right questions, the questions that are more likely to keep you moving towards the fulfillment of your desire.

What was I thinking?

What beliefs do I know now I have that are holding me back?

What action did I take that created that result?

What action didn’t I take that I had thought about, but dismissed?

Did I ignore my intuition?

Did I invest the time in the inner work before taking any action?

Did I expect to get what I wanted?

Stop arguing for your limitations

Every time you see yourself as a victim, think limiting thoughts or engage in finger pointing you’re defending habits that are destructive to your wellbeing.

Life will always give you feedback. If you’re feeling unhappy, or frequently tired and struggling, it’s a message that something needs to change. Take care of yourself by not ignoring the useful feedback your reactions bring.

You are capable of designing the kind of life where the sparks of possibility become flames of accomplishment…don’t get in your own way.

You deserve to be happy and create the life of your dreams and this means letting go of your excuses, your reasons for why you can’t and haven’t, and all the stories you tell yourself that portray you as a victim.

Stop complaining

Living the life you want can be simple, but not always easy. Notice when you’re complaining…it doesn’t make things better. Learn to take it easy on yourself, dream outrageous dreams and believe that you can make something in your life that wasn’t there before.

Always be kind to yourself and others and begin by making the decision to stop complaining and ignore the complainers in your life. You are here to do something unique. Don’t allow others to make you forget that, by getting caught up in their negativity.

Taking responsibility for your life means both your successes and failures. Complaining never changes anything but choosing to have a positive attitude does. Never underestimate the repelling power of negativity…you don’t want to miss out when opportunity knocks.

Acknowledge your responsibility for your life and you’ll be taking control of the future you want.

Don’t put your attention on every small fly that threatens to mar the beauty of the day, keep your eye on that beauty and before too long that’s all you’ll notice.

Stop waiting for the perfect time

If you’re waiting for the stars to align in your favour, you might be waiting a long time. Design your own stars. Acknowledge you’ve always done the best you can with what you knew at the time. And now you’re ready to do even better.

Every new day sets you free from the the past, celebrate them they’re about to release you from the lies of your limiting beliefs. No more waiting for a more benevolent horoscope, inspiration to strike, someone to help you, the right relationship to appear, permission to be granted, reassurance given.

Direct your thoughts and actions to your target right now. If you miss, adjust your aim and do it again. And then again, and soon you’ll be scoring a bullseye.

Then it’s time for a new target. It’s time to become the person you were always meant to be, even if you don’t yet know how to become them.

All you have to do is decide what it is you want and who you choose to be, life is much more a matter of choice than chance. Believe you deserve it, affirm you have it and take as much time as you need to practice the principles that will allow you to flourish.

You might not think you have the talents or gifts that you see in others, but if you choose to believe anything is possible, you can accomplish almost anything. Your beliefs will always help create your experiences.

Bottom line

You can’t flourish if you continue to act in the same old ways,  from a heart that uses all it’s energy to maintain the very things that hold you back. Think about it…all the time wasted on focusing on what you don’t want could be invested in adding a new image to your visualizing technique, your ideal life, the things you wish to realize.

Don’t simply expect the best, get to work and make the best happen. You owe it to yourself.

In the comments below I’d love to hear your thoughts. What dream are you ready to experience and what are you going to stop doing that’s getting in your way? 

Thank you for contributing to the conversation. Your wisdom and experience help us all to take action on the things that keep us stuck. If you think this post would encourage or motivate someone you know, please share it.

Encourage one another.

Love Elle


Elle Sommer is the author of 4 books and a workbook. Her latest publications are a series called The Power of Consciousness, and you will find all three books in this trilogy now available on Kindle. She shares quotes, inspiration and positive vibes on Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest. And her greatest desire is to encourage and inspire others to create not just a good life, but a phenomenal life.


  1. Wow this touched a nerve with me, I especially know that waiting for the perfect time, as then that means i have put the brakes on and I watch myself do that and then like last week the universe conspires when i choose not to follow the nudges!!!!! Thanks Elle

    • Elle

      Who hasn’t done this Suzie…that old perfect time somehow never seems to show up. Do you think it’s because the perfect time is actually right here and now? 🙂

      • Yes spot on, and sometimes it is a merrygoround, the time might be okay but you are not ready. Yesterday i found a video i had made 4-5 years ago with the words I am using now on my new design, the words were right I wasn’t ready LOL

  2. Hi Ell; thanks for another awesome post. Over the last few days I put it out to my social media communities that i am looking for a way to get out and meet my clients and visit some of the major businesses in the amusement industry. I made a couple of suggestions. I didn’t complain about what i didn’t have or couldn’t do. I got a few good suggestions. I also got a couple of pretty negative ones. These people said no professional business person ever asks others to help him solve a problem. I replied that i saw nothing wrong with my approach as I am no longer one of those people who is willing to say i’ll do it tomorrow next week next month or heaven forbid next year if i can find a way to do it now. And I’m not afraid to ask for opinions suggestions whatever to get from here to there. And just a little while ago I was contacted by a fellow who wants to talk more and see if he can’t come up with a way to make my dreams of traveling the world to do the youtube shows about the amusement industry a reality. He may be able to help he may not; but I’m going to bed with the hope that tomorrow morning will bring something really special. Thanks again for keeping us moving in the right direction. Take care, Max

    • Elle

      Hi Max, you have a fabulous outlook on life. I think the inability to seek the expertise of others is a major stumbling block to many. The great thing about people like Henry Ford is that he had others to put into practice what he couldn’t do by himself because it wasn’t his area of expertise. He just knew what he wanted and knew a way would be found to make it happen. Quite honestly, why get in the way of letting a greater power, the universe, source energy whatever name you choose to use sending the people and things we need to fulfill our desires? Kudos to you. 🙂

      • and walt disney couldn’t draw. none of us can do it all. so yes we have to get out of our own way and ask for the people we need to come into our lives. last night i was contacted by the owner of a marketing company who has an interest in youtube and other social media marketing and wants to discuss my goals and see what can be done to make them happen. and i have a good attitude now but this is after getting healthy by finding out i had sleep apnea and getting it treated it includes leaving a business i wasn’t happy in and that was failing already and of course using all the weight. and i can’t say too much about the benefits of knowing so many positive encouraging uplifting people out here in the bloggosphere and the online world in general. thanks for being part of my story and take care, max

  3. This is thoughtful and practical. People tend to dwell on what is holding them back and what the next person has. as a Meaning Of Life blogger I think this is one purpose of life on the physical plane – to realize that these things are less important as we get older. Good message!

    • Elle

      I too find different things have greater value for me these days Albert. I’ve come to the conclusion that if we have to choose between love and fear I’m going for love. And it isn’t a challenge to work out which is which! 🙂

  4. Thanks Elle for encouraging me with this post. “Flourish” is such a beautiful word, and evokes a state of mind as well as physical abundance. I am applying your advice to “adjust your aim” and try different approaches as I connect with others and remain open to new possibilities!

    • Elle

      I know you use the word ‘thrive’ Martine and I like the feeling of that word also. Sometimes we miss the target and throw everything out of the window when all it needs is a little tweaking of our aim. Good for you for keeping an open mind. Awareness is all it takes to say yes to the amazing possibilities that abound in our world. 🙂

  5. Love this line – “Life will always give you feedback.” That is so true and it is nice to embrace that feedback, learn from it and move forward. Great encouragement here, Elle. We do need to do the work to make our lives the best they can by. Thanks for all the great work that you do!

    • “Life will always give you feedback.” ==> Agreed!

      I once read somewhere that one of the best ways to progress as any kind of artist, be it a writer, a musician, or painter is to put yourself / your work out there and get instant feedback.

      I know that’s slightly off the point, but worth pondering I think. 🙂

      • Elle

        Probably quite on point Jeremy, feedback comes to us in all sorts of forms I think, if we keep and open mind and look for it. And yes it’s definitely worth a ponder! 🙂

    • Elle

      Thanks Cathy I always appreciate you stopping by and hopefully others will see the link to your site and follow you back…the work you do for others must bring you great joy. 🙂

  6. Hi Elle. I read your blog regularly, but this one has to be the BEST one I have ever read. In perfect time I might add. Lately, my intuition has been telling me something I need to do, and this post drove the point home in a great way. Thanks for your great insights!!

    • Elle

      Welcome to the conversation Rick, would love to hear the outcome of you listening to your intuition. 🙂

  7. Asking a wrong question is like invalidating ourselves. Why did I do that? Why didn’t I check? Though we didn’t blame anyone, we blame ourselves. This is another kind of blame. Thank you for the valuable post.

    • Elle

      And so many people to that to themselves. There’s a huge difference, as I know you know Joe, between accepting responsibility for our part in our experiences and blame. How do you get your clients to see the difference? 🙂

  8. This is lovely, Elle, truly lovely! I think, no, I know that I am very guilty of repeating negative thought patterns/actions and expecting different outcomes. I think I realize this even more now that I am trying to change those thought patterns/actions.

    • Elle

      None of us are ever perfect, but as so many philosophers tell us the joy is in the journey Jessica. And I do find this to be true for myself, each realization, each awareness takes us higher up the mountain of self realization and it’s a fabulous journey, especially when shared with so many amazing souls who have a burning desire to grow and experience their best selves. Thank you for sharing the journey. 🙂

  9. “Don’t simply expect the best, get to work and make the best happen. You owe it to yourself.” love this sentiment. Working at your own good luck seems counterintuitive but oh, so important. People stopped handing me things on a silver platter oh about, forever ago. You make your own destiny. Cheers!

    • Elle

      I know what you mean Linda about the counter intuitive thing. But it’s so true isn’t it, we’re always making our life experience with every thought, every feeling, every day. Might as well keep our focus on the good stuff. 🙂

  10. Thank you, Elle! You always know how to give a push in the right direction with your words! I really appreciate that!

    • Elle

      And thank you Cher, your cheery words always bring a smile to my heart. 🙂

  11. I have always wanted to write professionally, but I have held back. This month I decided to go for it, I even put a Hire Me tab on my blog…but the doubt creeps in and the second thoughts are always there. Your post is very timely for me and has just reenergized me to quiet those voices and forge forward! Thanks!

    • Elle

      Yay Kim, can’t wait to hear about your great success. When you think of how much time we have on this planet, we might as well get started on living our dreams. You encourage us all kiddo. 🙂

  12. My first step was sending this comment. I’m enlighted by some of the things I’ve read on your page, hope to continue to see more.

    • Elle

      Hi Rhonda and welcome. It’s so lovely to add you in our community of encouragement and support and kindness. Step one done, baby steps is all it takes to keep moving in the direction of your dreams. We’ll walk with you if you’d like. 🙂

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