[success]If you’re carrying strong feelings about something that happened in your past, they may hinder your ability to live in the present. ~ Les Brown[/success]

The most incredible discovery I made about life is that it can be altered by a change in attitude.

What you know is important, but what you feel about what you know is even more important because those feelings make up your attitude. So if it’s a change in life you desire, then it’s to feelings that you must turn.

Our Encourager for the month of February, shares noteworthy steps to manage the feelings that prevent you from designing a better quality of life.

A big warm welcome to the positive and insightful  Zeenat Merchant Syal.

A warm loving heart is a gift beyond all else.

I lived my formative years, right till my twenties, in a desert (Muscat). I was never a fan of the warm temperatures there, they could literally burn your skin and make you dehydrated in a matter of seconds.

Sun block and sun glasses weren’t optional, they were a necessity!

But now, after some traveling and being around the cold wintry places of the world, I have come to appreciate the warm temperatures and the sun. Though this past winter was really chilly in this part of the world, more than I was ever used to before.

As the sun took its rightful place of spreading its warmth, so did I shed my icy cold feelings. Focusing on warmth came naturally, and also as a surprise. I noticed more colors around me, more beauty around me and most of all, I love how this new warmth brought about a thawing within my heart.

There were feelings so frozen cold inside my heart, that refused to surface over the years….this new sun’s warmth brought them to surface. The release of which have made me feel lighter and happier.

We all have pent up feelings we don’t acknowledge

And these feelings end up scarring our life, our thoughts, our actions…everything. Having gone through this recently and coming out on the warmer, sunnier, more positive side, I can simply say, please dissolve those stuck, pent up feelings. They might not come out in the most desirable way, but believe me the release is like breaking free from negative anchors that were holding you down.

So, how do we break free?

Two positive steps to warm those cold feelings

Step 1 – Identify the feeling

That uncertain discomfort that you feel while in a conversation with a loved one, those feelings you have wanted to convey over the years but haven’t been able to, those moments when after a certain conversation or meeting you are sad or cry inconsolably…these are the signs and feelings that need to be identified.

Once you have identified them….think “Why have I been holding on to this for so long?”…the answer your heart gives you will astonish you.

Step 2 – Release and Forgive

Releasing those cold feelings can be a daunting task. We each have been conditioned to be ‘perfect’. And without even knowing it, we try to be just that. In doing so we don’t say so many things we should and we shove so many feelings within us we shouldn’t.

If the pent up feelings are towards a person you have been afraid to face, then send them a gentle email or text stating the feeling and tell them you forgive them (and mean it).

If the cold feeling is towards yourself, look at yourself in the mirror and say I forgive me for……. (fill in the blank with whatever its that you are holding yourself responsible for)

Releasing the cold, negative feelings, WILL free you. Give it a go.

These cold pent up feelings left in the cold too long can create toxic effects on our complete being. Once you have showed these feelings the warmth by identifying and releasing them….you will realize what amazing parts of your personality come to light with it too.

Look within, open your heart and let your old, cold feelings bask in the warmth of your amazing light.

As always thank you for reading and sharing and welcoming Zeenat. Hope to see you in the comments with your insights and wisdom.

Encourage one another

Love Elle



 Zeenat Merchant Syal – is the founder and writer of Positive Provocations – Healing with Positivity, Love & Happiness! She’s a practicing Counseling Psychologist, Spiritual Counselor, Motivational Speaker, Naturopath, Holistic Healer and Writer by passion and by profession. Her aim in life is “To ease human suffering through positivity, love & happiness”. She wants to be remembered as a person who shed light & made a positive impact on the lives of others.



  1. Dear Zeenat,
    How true that we cannot heal until we acknowledge our feelings in an honest and authentic way. We don’t need to dwell on them, but bringing them up to the light will help to melt them away. What a beautiful metaphor!

    • Hi Sandra,
      Sometimes the metaphors just fit like a glove and this is one such positive instance when the heart just knew it had to thaw out 🙂
      So glad you liked this post. Thank you so much for your beautiful comment here.
      Much Love,

  2. Hello Zeenat and nice meeting you.

    I’ve been coming to Elle’s blog regularly for a short while, because as a personal development blogger and coach, I think that it’s important to support and encourage other bloggers like us, and by doing so I’ve met people I might have never met such as you.

    Those negative and consuming feelings are really poisonous for the mind and body, so it’s very essential to locate and recognize them in order to get rid of them. It’s very liberating and help us grown.

    I always encourage my clients to forgive themselves, because they are the person they often have the most resentment against. I use Louise Hay method to look at myself in the mirror and say “I love you, I really, really love you.”

    Thank you for that great analogy to bring your point home.

    • Hi Sylviane,
      How lovely to connect with you here on Elle’s wonderful blog! Connections are far more satisfying when they are with like minds and like hearts 🙂
      I love the Louise Hay methods too and use them often. Your clients are very lucky to have you support them with such positive insight.
      I’m happy you liked this article. Thank you for your insightful comment here.
      Much Love,

  3. Dearest Elle,
    Thank you so much for the opportunity to share my thoughts with your beautiful readers. I love being the Encourager of the Month 🙂 What a fulfilling title!
    And I absolutely love how you have acknowledged that change for the positive is entirely possible.
    Immense Love and gratitude,

    • My dear friend, you are such a delight and your light illuminates this site with your usual loving style. I thank you for being our Encourager of the month..it’s a role that fits you perfectly. 🙂

  4. Release and forgive, Zeenat, is the key to opening up the heart, letting go and warming up the heart. Plus it lets go of burdens and the toxicity you mention. I know for a fact, through personal experience, that releasing and forgiving will let go of animosity towards ourselves and others. It’s interesting that when we hold animosity, we feel it’s negative impact on toxicity on us, not the other person. So for more light and warmth, we need to forgive. Forgive for others but even moreso, forgive for ourselves.

    • Vishnu,
      Lovely seeing you here 🙂
      I love how you say, ” It’s interesting that when we hold animosity, we feel it’s negative impact on toxicity on us, not the other person.” Its so true! The negative impact of our toxic feelings only hurt our own well being not the others…yet we hold on to so many past wounds. Forgiveness definitely paves the way for more love and warmth within and around us.
      Thank you for sharing you beautiful thoughts here.
      Much Love,

  5. Beautiful post! I love the idea of acknowledging where the “cold” comes from and being willing to let it go with genuine forgiveness. That’s such a beautiful and necessary lesson for us all.

    • Hi Jessica,
      So glad you liked this post! Acknowledging where the pain comes from is imperative to our healing. Many of us live with neglect and unknowingly allow this pain to take over our lives.
      May we all be blessed with the power to forgive ourselves and others.
      Thank you for your lovely comment here.
      Much Love,

  6. Wonderful article, Zeenat! It truly is empowering to just let go of the “cold” feelings and embrace new, warm feelings!

    • Hi Cher,
      Thank you for your cheerful comment here. I’m glad this article resonated with you 🙂
      I am guessing you are a warm fuzzy feelings kinda gal….Your picture here says it all!
      Much Love,

  7. Hi Elle; Once again you have given us a lot to think about as w continue on our path to being the person god meant us to be. I am curious about how you deal with forgiving people like family or business associates you have to continue having contact with but whom you know will most likely continue to do hurtful things to you or to the people you care about? looking forward to your help here. Thanks, max

  8. Hi Max,
    Its usually very daunting for us to stay in constant contact with someone who has hurt us..and forgiving seems very far fetched a thought..right? But, this is when we need to forgive the most…cause it saves us from the everyday heartache.
    Forgive them and realize they too have are coming from a place of pain and suffering. Many mask their pain by becoming rude, dominating and hurtful. Realize that whenever they say or do something to hurt you, they are only masking their own pain. This will make your heart softer and warmer towards them…making it easier to forgive them.
    When you forgive someone, its less for them and more for your own inner peace. Sometimes you need to be selfish when it comes to your own well being. Our pain has no effect on the other person but it directly scars our heart. To heal, we must forgive and then let them simply BE. Let the Universe handle the rest.
    I hope the above helps you Max. If you need anymore clarity just let me know. I would love to help you.
    Thank you for sharing yourself here.
    Much Love,

    • Thanks for stopping by Linda. It was lovely having Zeenat as a guest author, she writes with such heart. 🙂

    • Hi Linda,
      I love that you love the warm too 🙂 May we all be blessed with warm hearts and igniting souls.
      Thank you for your loving comment here.
      Much Love,

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